Everyone has a dead corner in their life, they can't get out of themselves and others can't get in.
Everyone has a wound, deep or shallow, light or dark, everyone has a line of tears, others won't understand
Because the most we can do is to think from the perspective of others. True empathy is impossible. How can life be fulfilled in every way? Everything has gains and losses.
Life requires hard work, but you should learn to make choices. But how many people can truly judge gains and losses based on their inner thoughts and make choices?
I lived in an ordinary family since I was a child. My father was from the north and an ordinary worker. Later, I drove by myself and my mother turned out to be from the south and was a doctor.
So I often joke that my parents divorced when I was very young, and my mother later remarried, so I have a half-sister who is nearly ten years younger than me and is half-sister who is nearly ten years younger than me
Due to some family reasons, I have been taking care of her since the fifth grade of elementary school.
My dad and I grew up
Because he gave me good words and deeds, I basically don’t have the extreme and inferior personality that children from a single-parent family are prone to have.
I started learning dance at the age of five, and I took the art exam in college. I participated in a dance competition before graduating from college, but because I rejected the dirty request of a main leader of the organizer at that time, it was the so-called unspoken rule. I only got the second place, and my grades were not satisfactory.
I lost the closest opportunity to realize my ideal. Although I have never regretted it yet, I am engaged in dance teaching and I can apply what I have learned. However, compared to the stage center of my childhood, my dream under the spotlight has gradually faded away.
I think whether life is willing to be lonely or not, the premise should have the correct value orientation.
Don't regard hope as ideal
Ideals have nothing to do with interests; don't regard worldly sense as
Achievement is the sublimation of inner body and mind. A worldly person cannot control his destiny; don’t regard numbness as deep, deepness does not mean ruthlessness; don’t regard cowardice as steady
Stability is never an escape; don't treat slippery as wisdom
A little cleverness can never be compared with great wisdom; don't regard recklessness as courage
Great wisdom can produce great courage
Great courage can also produce great wisdom; don’t regard naivety as love
Childhood will only bring confusion and emptiness; don't regard extremeness as persistence
Extremeness is a pathology, persistence is the kingly way; don’t treat confusion as opportunities, need to be rational and pragmatic, confusion is uncontrollable, and greed for gains for nothing often makes people lose more.
I experienced four relationship experiences before getting married. Although one was not very glorious, I thought that each of them really liked each other and gave all my strength. They were my high school partner, my college partner, my dance partner, and my ex-boyfriend.
As for why they failed to reach the end, the various reasons are hard to describe
The best relationship is my ex-boyfriend. My ex-boyfriend and I fell in love very much. My thought at that time was that if you never leave me, I will depend on each other forever.
But my dad doesn't like him, mainly because his conditions are average. My dad hopes that I will live a better life in the future. He also thinks that with my conditions, he can find a better one, so he firmly disagrees with my ex-boyfriend getting married.
Introducing me and my current husband, my father and I had a strong conflict. This was something we had never seen before. They even said ruthless words to each other, and then my father fell ill
This may be the first time that I have learned to think seriously from the perspective of others. Think about it, my dad is also doing my best for me. For me, my dad has paid too much. He alone wants me to attend the best dance class, specialty class, musical instruments, taekwondo, etc., and he also provides me with the help of college. He only drives to make money. The hardships can be imagined.
He had two partners after the divorce, but my dad felt that they were not good to me, so he broke up and never remarried. My dad could sacrifice his happiness for me, and I could no longer just do my best.
I promised to break up with my ex-boyfriend and start getting along with my husband, but I secretly dated my ex-boyfriend.
Eventually, I promised to marry my husband.
My dad's illness was not detected at first, so he came to a large hospital and was diagnosed with a brain tumor. He needed immediate surgery. The doctor said that pre-operative and post-treatment would probably cost more than 500,000 yuan.
Five hundred thousand is undoubtedly an astronomical figure in my family at that time. I could only beg my mother without hiding it. Unexpectedly, she said that if I could do my best to find a way, I would be helpless in this matter. I felt so hard to describe at that time. I lamented the coldness of the world.
Just when I was at a loss, my husband offered to take all the expenses from their family.
At that time, I had not fully agreed to be with someone else
He manages some business in his father's company, and his business is quite different from that of my family.
When I had no choice but to agree to their funding, I knew that this might be God's will.
There is a saying that adding icing on the cake is worse than helping you in time. Help me when I was most helpless and saved my closest person in the world. What reason do I have to refuse him?
In this way, my husband and I got married two months later. I didn’t live with him before getting married. A few days before getting married, my ex-boyfriend and I met in a hotel for the last time. I proposed not to meet again in the future. He also took some photos and said he would like to remember. That night, the first time in my life was the only time I got drunk so far. We hugged each other and cried for a long time.
I don’t want to recall many things anymore. Memories are sometimes a kind of pain. I’m already in tears.
My husband and I feel like we get married first and then fall in love. We only get to know each other more deeply after getting married. Because of the quality of work, he has a lot of social engagements and likes friends. He smokes, drinks, and plays cards. He doesn't like to stay at home if he has nothing to do.
I am relatively homeless. I like reading books when I have time, watching movies, TV series, shopping, swimming, and sometimes I go out to play with friends.
He had a girlfriend who lived together before he got married, but he was not married
He has a little virgin plot, and occasionally regrets not getting my first time. He only knows that I have a relationship with my ex-boyfriend. I didn't tell him anything else. When he asked about some things about me and my ex-boyfriend, I just couldn't remember them clearly. I didn't want to deliberately deceive him. I think there are some things I know too much about my relationship with each other. It's not that I'm going to know too much about my feelings for each other. It's not a good thing.
Days go by day, and I feel happy in the early months of my marriage, but it may be as the love period passes, or it may be because of my education, interests, and hobbies.
He communicated with me less and less, and his life was also decreasing. He basically once a week or so, and it felt like he was doing routine.
More overtime
At first I didn't feel anything. I thought he was tired from work, and they became completely familiar with each other, and their relationship faded, so I didn't think about anything.
Until something breaks our peaceful life
One weekend, my husband and I went to the store to buy things. I forgot why, my husband and I walked apart for a while. When I caught up with him, I happened to see my husband meet a woman.
The woman was obviously a little too enthusiastic, holding my husband's arm and joking, and my husband waved his hand to suggest that she was inconvenient. The woman might not understand my husband's meaning. It was not until my husband found me that they stopped awkwardly.
The woman is pretty good-looking, with bangs scattered on her forehead, wearing a red T-shirt, and a denim. She was a little fat and walked away without saying anything.
My husband said he was an ordinary colleague, but based on their expressions, his intuition told me that it might not be that simple.
But I didn't ask in depth
But since then I began to pay attention to my husband's words and deeds
Sometimes I feel that he is deliberately avoiding me when he is calling, and he doesn't think too much. I hope it's because I'm suspicious.
Once my husband was not at home. When I was looking for a swimming pool card, I found the bag that my husband had forgotten at home. In the zipper-up interlayer inside his bag, I suddenly found several condoms. My husband and I discussed not having children for the time being. First, he thought about the world of two people for a while, and second, my job was in the rising period, and considering that pregnancy had a great impact on my career.
So I have used condoms for a while, but this brand of condoms has definitely not been used with me. Could it be my husband?
When my husband came home that day, I pretended not to know anything. At night, my husband fell asleep. I took his phone and looked at it.
I never doubted my husband before, so I didn't turn over his stuff. My husband might also see that I was simple and relaxed his vigilance towards me. I never looked at his mobile phone before.
I saw a message in my phone, which was very ambiguous. I told a woman to each other, what did I miss you? Is it comfortable? Where is next time? There is also a photo in my phone, I am a little familiar. I seem to have seen this woman, oh, it was the one I was in the store that time.
The message was short and the pregnancy condom was covered, and the iron evidence made me angry. I changed my past tenderness and pulled my sleeping husband up...
I pulled my husband up and thought, I should stop making trouble in the middle of the night. The neighbors are already asleep. What's more, my sister didn't live in school tonight and fell asleep in the bedroom next to us. It was not good to wake her up and hear it, so I decided to clean up him tomorrow.
But my husband woke me up, so I had to say casually: The water on the bathroom floor was not clean, which made me almost fall
After saying that, I fell down
My husband sat up and might not feel like I usually have a temper. He lay down again in confusion and fell asleep after a while
I couldn't sleep all night, my heart was so painful that I couldn't say.
I knew it might be unwise to choose to marry him, but I also married him with the idea of spending my whole life with him. Now it seems not only unwise, but it may be too wrong. The thoughts that seemed very beautiful instantly disappeared. It was so heartbreaking that I had only had it when I completely broke up with my ex-boyfriend.
I have never lacked the attention and pursuit of men. Although I have never taken the initiative to attract anyone, the end of my relationship with me was the breakup I proposed.
Thinking of the scenes in the past, for the first time I felt a sense of lack of confidence in my feelings, a sense of failure that I never had before, and even a kind of indescribable hesitation about the future
Before I knew it, tears had already hit the pillow. I got up very early the next day. My sister had classes in school, so I didn’t have the heart to make breakfast. I took some money for her, and then left after a few simple instructions.
After my husband got up, he prepared to eat as usual. When he saw that there was nothing, he asked me why I didn't cook.
I said: Let your good looks cook for you
My husband saw that my face was wrong and said: What a joke, Ah, then I'll go out to eat
I saw that my husband took the opportunity to leave and grabbed him. Today you can explain this matter clearly!
Seeing that I was so angry, my husband said: What the hell is that I can’t understand what you said!
I was pretending to be confused, what happened to your message on the phone, who is that woman?
My husband was surprised and at a loss when he saw me discovering his secret, but after a while he pretended to be justified and said that this was something I was joking with others. You should take it seriously, stop making trouble, I was late to work
I went to the bedroom to take out the condoms and threw them on the ground and said, "Where did this come from?" You said! You said!
My husband was still stubborn. Sometimes he said that he bought it and didn't have time to tell me. Sometimes he said that it was someone else put it in his bag, so he obviously couldn't justify himself.
I don't know how long it took to quarrel, but his mobile phone rang. It was my father-in-law who called it, as if he was asking why he didn't come to work.
I was so excited that I was still arguing with him
I blocked the door and refused to let him go out. He sat on the sofa. No matter what I said, he was silent. It was golden. The situation was stalemate like this.
At noon, someone knocked on the door and my father-in-law came. It turned out that he heard us quarrel on the phone and came here to find out the situation.
Seeing that we were like this, my father-in-law threw things all over the floor
My husband is busy picking up pregnancy condoms on the ground
My father-in-law asked what was going on, and I said, "I'll ask your baby son. If he likes others, just go with others." Anyway, I must divorce him.
After listening to my brief talk about the process, my father-in-law kept saying that my husband was not. Xiaoqing is not good at all. You are in a blessing and don’t know how lucky you are. If you really get divorced, you will never find such a good life.
The more my father-in-law said, the more harsh you were: Are you talking to the woman in the warehouse? I said that seeing something wrong with you, I didn’t expect that something really happened. I will open her tomorrow. If you don’t want to do it, get out of here...
At this time, my husband also admitted his mistake and said that he would not be able to get along with her in the future
I couldn't stop crying when I heard this and said I would like to divorce. My father-in-law also began to persuade me, saying that I would like to calm down first, and pay attention to my body.
He took my husband to work and scolded him while walking
After get off work at night, my husband didn't go out to play cards like usual. I was so angry that I didn't eat much. My husband couldn't compensate me. The more I thought about it, the more I felt uncomfortable, and tears fell down again. My husband didn't coax me, just saying sorry.
When he went to bed at night, he put his arms around my shoulder and said, "Don't be angry, and he wanted to get close to me in a tentative way."
I shook his hand away, turned his back to him, and he didn't dare to touch me that night
I was in a bad mood and didn't go to work the next day. I was alone at home and thought a lot. I said I was determined to divorce, but after thinking about it carefully, I didn't want to divorce too much.
Even if you find another person for divorce, you may not be better than him. You don’t think that the best person you can’t get is the best. You all want to find different women, it depends on whether there are conditions and opportunities.
After my husband and I quarreled, I went back to my dad's house for two days on the weekend. I didn't say anything about me and my husband. I didn't complain to my dad when I went home. I didn't want my dad to know, so I pretended to be fine.
However, my expression and behavior still made him see the flaws. He asked me what was going on, but I couldn't tell the truth.
Dad was silent for a long time, sighed and said something, all blame me
I said it's okay
I know he was guilty of resolutely not letting me marry my ex-boyfriend at that time. In fact, he might not believe it. I no longer blame him.
At that time, my father was suddenly hospitalized and experienced the test of life and death. The only thing I thought at that time was that I was willing to exchange all my life for his health. I was afraid that I would not have time to be filial. The trees were quiet and the wind was not stopped. The children were raised but the parents were not waiting. You would accompany me to grow up, and I would accompany you to grow old.
Time is the best medicine. My husband and I have been in a stalemate for more than half a month, and my mood has slowly calmed down. We have basically forgiven my husband, but occasionally I still feel uncomfortable. Maybe I haven't completely forgiven myself yet
After this incident, I feel that many life has no ifs, only consequences and results.
Life often jokes with us. The more we look forward to, the more we will leave you. Whoever we are obsessed with will often hurt each other the most.
Some people fall in love with someone wrongly because of loneliness, but more people may fall in love with someone wrongly for the rest of their lives.
Even so, there is no need to complain, because complaining is useless to others, not to oneself, and not to do things. The so-called life is not satisfactory, but only want to be ashamed of
With the continuous growth of body and mind and the changes in situations, I gradually realized that happiness is not about getting the best things, but about cherishing what you have.
The three most romantic words are not that I love you, but that I am together
Later, I was not sure if my husband had someone else outside, and I felt that there were, but there should be no fixed lover. Women's intuition is very accurate. It is easy to change the country and difficult to change it. Maybe it was because I was smart and not as careless as before. I found no direct evidence.
My husband is a typical northern man with a personality. Unlike me, I have half of the southerner traits. He has a wide range of people, is funny, and looks good. Although he is not too tall and has a bit fat, he gives people a sense of intimacy overall, so he is also a type that some girls like.
He also knows that I attract men. Even if I feel visual fatigue with me now, I have never denied that I am very good in every aspect.
My husband also likes to lead me to some formal social occasions or informal small gatherings, saying that with a noble woman like you, she is very proud of her face in front of her friends. Of course, what he said is not sure about is true or false, but he does love face very much.
I'm a little narcissistic, although I look average, but I think my overall temperament is not inferior to that of any woman
I usually feel a little arrogant, and it is not easy for ordinary people to approach me. This may be my weakness in personality. The contrast is large, and my normal state is also like a quiet virgin and moving like a rabbit.
I think women who can't choose their appearance, but their temperament can be completely self-cultivated can be simply divided into ladies, talented women, witches, vulgar women, and fierce women.
In terms of temperament, it can be divided into high-level levels such as noble, wise, elegant, elegant, mèi, pretty, handsome, cool, etc.
It is difficult for a woman to have a lifelong life: her heart belongs to her parents, her body belongs to her husband, her time belongs to her children, and only wrinkles belong to her own!
Be more beautiful, cause trouble, be more ugly, no one pays attention; be cheerful, say you are crazy; talk less, say it's hard to communicate
Want to be single, say no one wants to marry, you can't get married, you can't have freedom; your husband is handsome, it's easy to become someone else's, you are not handsome, I'm sorry for your own eyes, don't want children, say you are not a real woman, you want a child, you are tired of yourself
Want to do a career, say you don’t care about your family and want to show off; don’t make money, say you are too incompetent and rely on others to support you; put on some makeup, say you are too arrogant and don’t put on makeup, say you are yellow-faced woman
If you don’t have friends, you have no place to complain. If you have friends, you say you are restless. So women should not make your own hard work too much: if you make a mistake, correct it; if you are sad, cry; if you are tired, look back; if you are tired, take a break; if you are desperate, helpless
Don’t forget what you once had; cherish what you have already obtained; don’t give up what you belong to yourself; keep memories of what you have lost; you must work hard to get what you want;
But the most important thing is to cherish yourself well. I think women are the most undesirable, and of course men, that is, to identify things that do not belong to you as yours, and then worry about gains and losses.
What's even more, it's something I lost without cherishing, but it's said to be completely betrayal of others
We must remember that even if someone really loves you so much that he can be a cow and a horse for you, don’t really treat the other person as a cow and a horse.
In addition, I think women should have their own independent work and financial resources regardless of appearance, conditions, or family background. What career brings us is not only money, but also an independent personality.
If a man is rich, no matter how beautiful you are, he may change you. So women should make money, manage finances, be acquainted, dress up, drive, do housework, etc.
Don’t be a woman who needs men, be a woman who needs men!
After getting married, my husband was not at ease with me. He knew that there were some people chasing me, such as asking me for dinner, dancing, or ordinary friends, or even wanting to have the opportunity to marry me. I don’t think much about their real purpose. My response is basically, I refuse what I say openly, I refuse what I suggest, and I pretend not to know what I have secretly in love with me.
A colleague was not married yet and he had a good impression of me. One night he sent me a message saying something like me, and said he had drunk too much. If disturbing me, it would be a loss of composure after drinking, and he said he would rather believe in ghosts in the world than a man's mouth.
But I know that when they drink too much, their credibility is still high.
I happened to see the short message when my husband was very close to me. When he saw the message he sent, he was obviously very unhappy and asked about his situation. I knew that he was mainly afraid that I would be with others, including in the classmate group before, and some boys said similar things to me half-jokingly, and he also saw them, so he often checked my mobile phone in the future.
At first I was a little disgusted and resentful. I had been awkward for a few days, but later I stopped sticking to it. I thought it might be because I cared too much about me. Anyway, I sometimes look at his phone player. If I am clear, I will clear myself. Let him go.
On Valentine's Day, that colleague gave me flowers again
I was not there when he sent it, so I put it under my desk. I thought about it, but I didn't send it back, and of course I didn't take it home. I didn't want him to have an illusion, but I just felt that if I returned it in person, I was afraid that the impact would be worse, and my colleagues would be very awkward in the future. Why not explain if I had the opportunity?
Every time I attend a class reunion, my husband is not very happy, although he didn't stop him.
At a party, I met my college partner. It turned out that he broke up after going abroad.
Just returned to China and got married
Later he called me several times to have dinner, and my husband was a little unhappy
But my husband only thought it was my classmate who liked me, and he didn't know that he was my former partner.
He wants to get along with ordinary friends, I know what he wants to continue to develop, I didn't agree, I always feel that there is no simple friendship between men and women. If there is, at least one party is secretly in love with the other party
Among all my emotional experiences, my ex-boyfriend and I have the deepest relationship. It can be said that it is unforgettable, and I guess it will never forget it forever.
It is the boyfriend whom I had a relationship with a few days before my husband got married. How could I not miss him? Occasionally I remembered the scene of our ex-boyfriend. I deliberately refused to meet him. After getting married, I only called twice. The last time I contacted him, he was not married yet. He said he wanted to wait for me to try and always wanted to see me.
I didn't want to delay him, so I didn't contact him again
After getting married, I insisted on not seeing him. It’s not that I was too heartless. I am really afraid that after seeing him, I will not be able to control myself, so I will never want to separate from him again. That will hurt us not only. It’s better to miss us than to meet each other. You can’t support each other and forget each other in the world.
What was in the past will not come back, and even if it comes back, it will not be perfect
Can't see it, just carry it on your back
If you can't let go, remember
I can't bear it, so I keep it
One day I can't carry it, so I can see it
Can't remember it, so I let it go
Can't keep it anymore, so I'm willing to give it up
Cherish the people in front of you and do what you are in front of you
My husband said that he was just having fun with other women. Indeed, he has never found that he has a fixed lover so far. He has never thought about divorced me, and he has never mentioned divorced me when he quarreled with me.
I filed for divorce, he firmly opposed it
As long as I find that my husband has other women, I will definitely care, otherwise he will have the illusion that I let him casually. Good men are praised by others, not by others.
Since you are married, no matter how good or bad he is mine. Unless I don’t want it, no one can snatch it away, because I have heard many people say that no matter whether you remarry, you rarely find better than before.
My husband is good to me and my family, and I love me, but I just want to spend some time. Although I don’t share the same language and don’t communicate much, how can I be perfect?
I want to maintain this marriage
I don't want to cheat, nor do I want my husband to cheat, even if love slowly turns into only family love in the end
A friend once asked me, "My husband cheated on me, and I have never followed anyone after marriage. I really don't want to do it or I have never met someone I like."
I think there are two things, one is not. Men have lovers and women have a sense of guilt.
Another thing I can't accept is that there is no emotion, most men love, and most women love it because of love
An ancient Greek philosopher said that I forgot who it is: human speed is divided into two types, one is sensory and the other is spiritual. The sensory speed is short-lived and can never be obtained enough. The spiritual speed is lasting and can be obtained enough.
Another important point is that it may be difficult for me to meet someone who makes me so moved.
I wrote a passage before, and every time I think about it, I feel a lot of emotion: Everyone may meet four people in their life, the first one is yourself, the second one is the person you love the most, the third one is the person you love the most, and the fourth one is the person who spends his life together.
Life loves to joke the most, and the one you love the most often does not choose you; the one you love the most is often not what you love the most; and the one who ends up spending your life with you is not what you love the most or what you love the most, but the person who appears at the most suitable time
Who to live with, how to live with, how long, some people are because of love, some are because of material things, some are because of appearance, some are because of futures, and some are because of pressure. When you choose, you realize that the most important thing in love is not to surging love, sharing joys and sorrows, but not to leave
The one who has been with you for the longest is the one who loves you the most; the one who has been with you for the longest is the deepest love. What is the most important thing in life? I think it is freedom and true love.
Without freedom of body and mind, nothing else means. Freedom depends on gains and losses. Doing what you do is not freedom. Only by doing what you do and not doing can you gain true freedom. True feelings must be exchanged with sincerity. True feelings may not necessarily be exchanged with true feelings, but true feelings must be exchanged with sincerity.
Feelings are mutual, there is not much to take for granted and for no reason in the world, the only one who is happier than being loved is to love
Deeply ingrained family affection, plain friendship, and unforgettable love constitute our emotional world. Family affection is an innate fate. We cannot choose, and we are most unavoidable to avoid it. We need to take care of it.
Friendship is tolerant, love is selfish, friendship is as plain as water, and its sincerity and tolerance can be better compromised.
The selfishness, understanding, tolerance and unyielding love is easier to be unforgettable
No matter what kind of relationship it is, love is the least waiting and the most capable of waiting. If love is in front of you, wait for a second, love is long, if love is at the end, waiting for a lifetime is short
The three types of people that need to be cherished the most in this world: friends who help you in time, who are willing to accompany you through poor women, and who will tolerate your men in everything.
I have also done some things that do not conform to universal values. I either want to be wrong or wrong, and there is no need to find reasons to hide it. It's just that I'm more private, I didn't write it.
My experiences are actually not worth mentioning at all, but why do I need to write them out? I think it is not to relieve stress, nor to make people sensational
Maybe there is a little bit of reflection and self-analysis. There are many things. Only when the distance is getting farther and farther, can you look back and see it clearly.
People are very complicated, and everyone has different aspects, but overall I like to use people downward and people's hearts upward
Let's explain
Life is neither long nor short. How can you live without a standard answer? Why don’t you spend your life the way you like?
If God destined us to be small people, then try to be worthy of our relatives and friends, be worthy of ourselves, and not hurt others
Everyone has a wound, deep or shallow, light or dark, everyone has a line of tears, others won't understand
Because the most we can do is to think from the perspective of others. True empathy is impossible. How can life be fulfilled in every way? Everything has gains and losses.
Life requires hard work, but you should learn to make choices. But how many people can truly judge gains and losses based on their inner thoughts and make choices?
I lived in an ordinary family since I was a child. My father was from the north and an ordinary worker. Later, I drove by myself and my mother turned out to be from the south and was a doctor.
So I often joke that my parents divorced when I was very young, and my mother later remarried, so I have a half-sister who is nearly ten years younger than me and is half-sister who is nearly ten years younger than me
Due to some family reasons, I have been taking care of her since the fifth grade of elementary school.
My dad and I grew up
Because he gave me good words and deeds, I basically don’t have the extreme and inferior personality that children from a single-parent family are prone to have.
I started learning dance at the age of five, and I took the art exam in college. I participated in a dance competition before graduating from college, but because I rejected the dirty request of a main leader of the organizer at that time, it was the so-called unspoken rule. I only got the second place, and my grades were not satisfactory.
I lost the closest opportunity to realize my ideal. Although I have never regretted it yet, I am engaged in dance teaching and I can apply what I have learned. However, compared to the stage center of my childhood, my dream under the spotlight has gradually faded away.
I think whether life is willing to be lonely or not, the premise should have the correct value orientation.
Don't regard hope as ideal
Ideals have nothing to do with interests; don't regard worldly sense as
Achievement is the sublimation of inner body and mind. A worldly person cannot control his destiny; don’t regard numbness as deep, deepness does not mean ruthlessness; don’t regard cowardice as steady
Stability is never an escape; don't treat slippery as wisdom
A little cleverness can never be compared with great wisdom; don't regard recklessness as courage
Great wisdom can produce great courage
Great courage can also produce great wisdom; don’t regard naivety as love
Childhood will only bring confusion and emptiness; don't regard extremeness as persistence
Extremeness is a pathology, persistence is the kingly way; don’t treat confusion as opportunities, need to be rational and pragmatic, confusion is uncontrollable, and greed for gains for nothing often makes people lose more.
I experienced four relationship experiences before getting married. Although one was not very glorious, I thought that each of them really liked each other and gave all my strength. They were my high school partner, my college partner, my dance partner, and my ex-boyfriend.
As for why they failed to reach the end, the various reasons are hard to describe
The best relationship is my ex-boyfriend. My ex-boyfriend and I fell in love very much. My thought at that time was that if you never leave me, I will depend on each other forever.
But my dad doesn't like him, mainly because his conditions are average. My dad hopes that I will live a better life in the future. He also thinks that with my conditions, he can find a better one, so he firmly disagrees with my ex-boyfriend getting married.
Introducing me and my current husband, my father and I had a strong conflict. This was something we had never seen before. They even said ruthless words to each other, and then my father fell ill
This may be the first time that I have learned to think seriously from the perspective of others. Think about it, my dad is also doing my best for me. For me, my dad has paid too much. He alone wants me to attend the best dance class, specialty class, musical instruments, taekwondo, etc., and he also provides me with the help of college. He only drives to make money. The hardships can be imagined.
He had two partners after the divorce, but my dad felt that they were not good to me, so he broke up and never remarried. My dad could sacrifice his happiness for me, and I could no longer just do my best.
I promised to break up with my ex-boyfriend and start getting along with my husband, but I secretly dated my ex-boyfriend.
Eventually, I promised to marry my husband.
My dad's illness was not detected at first, so he came to a large hospital and was diagnosed with a brain tumor. He needed immediate surgery. The doctor said that pre-operative and post-treatment would probably cost more than 500,000 yuan.
Five hundred thousand is undoubtedly an astronomical figure in my family at that time. I could only beg my mother without hiding it. Unexpectedly, she said that if I could do my best to find a way, I would be helpless in this matter. I felt so hard to describe at that time. I lamented the coldness of the world.
Just when I was at a loss, my husband offered to take all the expenses from their family.
At that time, I had not fully agreed to be with someone else
He manages some business in his father's company, and his business is quite different from that of my family.
When I had no choice but to agree to their funding, I knew that this might be God's will.
There is a saying that adding icing on the cake is worse than helping you in time. Help me when I was most helpless and saved my closest person in the world. What reason do I have to refuse him?
In this way, my husband and I got married two months later. I didn’t live with him before getting married. A few days before getting married, my ex-boyfriend and I met in a hotel for the last time. I proposed not to meet again in the future. He also took some photos and said he would like to remember. That night, the first time in my life was the only time I got drunk so far. We hugged each other and cried for a long time.
I don’t want to recall many things anymore. Memories are sometimes a kind of pain. I’m already in tears.
My husband and I feel like we get married first and then fall in love. We only get to know each other more deeply after getting married. Because of the quality of work, he has a lot of social engagements and likes friends. He smokes, drinks, and plays cards. He doesn't like to stay at home if he has nothing to do.
I am relatively homeless. I like reading books when I have time, watching movies, TV series, shopping, swimming, and sometimes I go out to play with friends.
He had a girlfriend who lived together before he got married, but he was not married
He has a little virgin plot, and occasionally regrets not getting my first time. He only knows that I have a relationship with my ex-boyfriend. I didn't tell him anything else. When he asked about some things about me and my ex-boyfriend, I just couldn't remember them clearly. I didn't want to deliberately deceive him. I think there are some things I know too much about my relationship with each other. It's not that I'm going to know too much about my feelings for each other. It's not a good thing.
Days go by day, and I feel happy in the early months of my marriage, but it may be as the love period passes, or it may be because of my education, interests, and hobbies.
He communicated with me less and less, and his life was also decreasing. He basically once a week or so, and it felt like he was doing routine.
More overtime
At first I didn't feel anything. I thought he was tired from work, and they became completely familiar with each other, and their relationship faded, so I didn't think about anything.
Until something breaks our peaceful life
One weekend, my husband and I went to the store to buy things. I forgot why, my husband and I walked apart for a while. When I caught up with him, I happened to see my husband meet a woman.
The woman was obviously a little too enthusiastic, holding my husband's arm and joking, and my husband waved his hand to suggest that she was inconvenient. The woman might not understand my husband's meaning. It was not until my husband found me that they stopped awkwardly.
The woman is pretty good-looking, with bangs scattered on her forehead, wearing a red T-shirt, and a denim. She was a little fat and walked away without saying anything.
My husband said he was an ordinary colleague, but based on their expressions, his intuition told me that it might not be that simple.
But I didn't ask in depth
But since then I began to pay attention to my husband's words and deeds
Sometimes I feel that he is deliberately avoiding me when he is calling, and he doesn't think too much. I hope it's because I'm suspicious.
Once my husband was not at home. When I was looking for a swimming pool card, I found the bag that my husband had forgotten at home. In the zipper-up interlayer inside his bag, I suddenly found several condoms. My husband and I discussed not having children for the time being. First, he thought about the world of two people for a while, and second, my job was in the rising period, and considering that pregnancy had a great impact on my career.
So I have used condoms for a while, but this brand of condoms has definitely not been used with me. Could it be my husband?
When my husband came home that day, I pretended not to know anything. At night, my husband fell asleep. I took his phone and looked at it.
I never doubted my husband before, so I didn't turn over his stuff. My husband might also see that I was simple and relaxed his vigilance towards me. I never looked at his mobile phone before.
I saw a message in my phone, which was very ambiguous. I told a woman to each other, what did I miss you? Is it comfortable? Where is next time? There is also a photo in my phone, I am a little familiar. I seem to have seen this woman, oh, it was the one I was in the store that time.
The message was short and the pregnancy condom was covered, and the iron evidence made me angry. I changed my past tenderness and pulled my sleeping husband up...
I pulled my husband up and thought, I should stop making trouble in the middle of the night. The neighbors are already asleep. What's more, my sister didn't live in school tonight and fell asleep in the bedroom next to us. It was not good to wake her up and hear it, so I decided to clean up him tomorrow.
But my husband woke me up, so I had to say casually: The water on the bathroom floor was not clean, which made me almost fall
After saying that, I fell down
My husband sat up and might not feel like I usually have a temper. He lay down again in confusion and fell asleep after a while
I couldn't sleep all night, my heart was so painful that I couldn't say.
I knew it might be unwise to choose to marry him, but I also married him with the idea of spending my whole life with him. Now it seems not only unwise, but it may be too wrong. The thoughts that seemed very beautiful instantly disappeared. It was so heartbreaking that I had only had it when I completely broke up with my ex-boyfriend.
I have never lacked the attention and pursuit of men. Although I have never taken the initiative to attract anyone, the end of my relationship with me was the breakup I proposed.
Thinking of the scenes in the past, for the first time I felt a sense of lack of confidence in my feelings, a sense of failure that I never had before, and even a kind of indescribable hesitation about the future
Before I knew it, tears had already hit the pillow. I got up very early the next day. My sister had classes in school, so I didn’t have the heart to make breakfast. I took some money for her, and then left after a few simple instructions.
After my husband got up, he prepared to eat as usual. When he saw that there was nothing, he asked me why I didn't cook.
I said: Let your good looks cook for you
My husband saw that my face was wrong and said: What a joke, Ah, then I'll go out to eat
I saw that my husband took the opportunity to leave and grabbed him. Today you can explain this matter clearly!
Seeing that I was so angry, my husband said: What the hell is that I can’t understand what you said!
I was pretending to be confused, what happened to your message on the phone, who is that woman?
My husband was surprised and at a loss when he saw me discovering his secret, but after a while he pretended to be justified and said that this was something I was joking with others. You should take it seriously, stop making trouble, I was late to work
I went to the bedroom to take out the condoms and threw them on the ground and said, "Where did this come from?" You said! You said!
My husband was still stubborn. Sometimes he said that he bought it and didn't have time to tell me. Sometimes he said that it was someone else put it in his bag, so he obviously couldn't justify himself.
I don't know how long it took to quarrel, but his mobile phone rang. It was my father-in-law who called it, as if he was asking why he didn't come to work.
I was so excited that I was still arguing with him
I blocked the door and refused to let him go out. He sat on the sofa. No matter what I said, he was silent. It was golden. The situation was stalemate like this.
At noon, someone knocked on the door and my father-in-law came. It turned out that he heard us quarrel on the phone and came here to find out the situation.
Seeing that we were like this, my father-in-law threw things all over the floor
My husband is busy picking up pregnancy condoms on the ground
My father-in-law asked what was going on, and I said, "I'll ask your baby son. If he likes others, just go with others." Anyway, I must divorce him.
After listening to my brief talk about the process, my father-in-law kept saying that my husband was not. Xiaoqing is not good at all. You are in a blessing and don’t know how lucky you are. If you really get divorced, you will never find such a good life.
The more my father-in-law said, the more harsh you were: Are you talking to the woman in the warehouse? I said that seeing something wrong with you, I didn’t expect that something really happened. I will open her tomorrow. If you don’t want to do it, get out of here...
At this time, my husband also admitted his mistake and said that he would not be able to get along with her in the future
I couldn't stop crying when I heard this and said I would like to divorce. My father-in-law also began to persuade me, saying that I would like to calm down first, and pay attention to my body.
He took my husband to work and scolded him while walking
After get off work at night, my husband didn't go out to play cards like usual. I was so angry that I didn't eat much. My husband couldn't compensate me. The more I thought about it, the more I felt uncomfortable, and tears fell down again. My husband didn't coax me, just saying sorry.
When he went to bed at night, he put his arms around my shoulder and said, "Don't be angry, and he wanted to get close to me in a tentative way."
I shook his hand away, turned his back to him, and he didn't dare to touch me that night
I was in a bad mood and didn't go to work the next day. I was alone at home and thought a lot. I said I was determined to divorce, but after thinking about it carefully, I didn't want to divorce too much.
Even if you find another person for divorce, you may not be better than him. You don’t think that the best person you can’t get is the best. You all want to find different women, it depends on whether there are conditions and opportunities.
After my husband and I quarreled, I went back to my dad's house for two days on the weekend. I didn't say anything about me and my husband. I didn't complain to my dad when I went home. I didn't want my dad to know, so I pretended to be fine.
However, my expression and behavior still made him see the flaws. He asked me what was going on, but I couldn't tell the truth.
Dad was silent for a long time, sighed and said something, all blame me
I said it's okay
I know he was guilty of resolutely not letting me marry my ex-boyfriend at that time. In fact, he might not believe it. I no longer blame him.
At that time, my father was suddenly hospitalized and experienced the test of life and death. The only thing I thought at that time was that I was willing to exchange all my life for his health. I was afraid that I would not have time to be filial. The trees were quiet and the wind was not stopped. The children were raised but the parents were not waiting. You would accompany me to grow up, and I would accompany you to grow old.
Time is the best medicine. My husband and I have been in a stalemate for more than half a month, and my mood has slowly calmed down. We have basically forgiven my husband, but occasionally I still feel uncomfortable. Maybe I haven't completely forgiven myself yet
After this incident, I feel that many life has no ifs, only consequences and results.
Life often jokes with us. The more we look forward to, the more we will leave you. Whoever we are obsessed with will often hurt each other the most.
Some people fall in love with someone wrongly because of loneliness, but more people may fall in love with someone wrongly for the rest of their lives.
Even so, there is no need to complain, because complaining is useless to others, not to oneself, and not to do things. The so-called life is not satisfactory, but only want to be ashamed of
With the continuous growth of body and mind and the changes in situations, I gradually realized that happiness is not about getting the best things, but about cherishing what you have.
The three most romantic words are not that I love you, but that I am together
Later, I was not sure if my husband had someone else outside, and I felt that there were, but there should be no fixed lover. Women's intuition is very accurate. It is easy to change the country and difficult to change it. Maybe it was because I was smart and not as careless as before. I found no direct evidence.
My husband is a typical northern man with a personality. Unlike me, I have half of the southerner traits. He has a wide range of people, is funny, and looks good. Although he is not too tall and has a bit fat, he gives people a sense of intimacy overall, so he is also a type that some girls like.
He also knows that I attract men. Even if I feel visual fatigue with me now, I have never denied that I am very good in every aspect.
My husband also likes to lead me to some formal social occasions or informal small gatherings, saying that with a noble woman like you, she is very proud of her face in front of her friends. Of course, what he said is not sure about is true or false, but he does love face very much.
I'm a little narcissistic, although I look average, but I think my overall temperament is not inferior to that of any woman
I usually feel a little arrogant, and it is not easy for ordinary people to approach me. This may be my weakness in personality. The contrast is large, and my normal state is also like a quiet virgin and moving like a rabbit.
I think women who can't choose their appearance, but their temperament can be completely self-cultivated can be simply divided into ladies, talented women, witches, vulgar women, and fierce women.
In terms of temperament, it can be divided into high-level levels such as noble, wise, elegant, elegant, mèi, pretty, handsome, cool, etc.
It is difficult for a woman to have a lifelong life: her heart belongs to her parents, her body belongs to her husband, her time belongs to her children, and only wrinkles belong to her own!
Be more beautiful, cause trouble, be more ugly, no one pays attention; be cheerful, say you are crazy; talk less, say it's hard to communicate
Want to be single, say no one wants to marry, you can't get married, you can't have freedom; your husband is handsome, it's easy to become someone else's, you are not handsome, I'm sorry for your own eyes, don't want children, say you are not a real woman, you want a child, you are tired of yourself
Want to do a career, say you don’t care about your family and want to show off; don’t make money, say you are too incompetent and rely on others to support you; put on some makeup, say you are too arrogant and don’t put on makeup, say you are yellow-faced woman
If you don’t have friends, you have no place to complain. If you have friends, you say you are restless. So women should not make your own hard work too much: if you make a mistake, correct it; if you are sad, cry; if you are tired, look back; if you are tired, take a break; if you are desperate, helpless
Don’t forget what you once had; cherish what you have already obtained; don’t give up what you belong to yourself; keep memories of what you have lost; you must work hard to get what you want;
But the most important thing is to cherish yourself well. I think women are the most undesirable, and of course men, that is, to identify things that do not belong to you as yours, and then worry about gains and losses.
What's even more, it's something I lost without cherishing, but it's said to be completely betrayal of others
We must remember that even if someone really loves you so much that he can be a cow and a horse for you, don’t really treat the other person as a cow and a horse.
In addition, I think women should have their own independent work and financial resources regardless of appearance, conditions, or family background. What career brings us is not only money, but also an independent personality.
If a man is rich, no matter how beautiful you are, he may change you. So women should make money, manage finances, be acquainted, dress up, drive, do housework, etc.
Don’t be a woman who needs men, be a woman who needs men!
After getting married, my husband was not at ease with me. He knew that there were some people chasing me, such as asking me for dinner, dancing, or ordinary friends, or even wanting to have the opportunity to marry me. I don’t think much about their real purpose. My response is basically, I refuse what I say openly, I refuse what I suggest, and I pretend not to know what I have secretly in love with me.
A colleague was not married yet and he had a good impression of me. One night he sent me a message saying something like me, and said he had drunk too much. If disturbing me, it would be a loss of composure after drinking, and he said he would rather believe in ghosts in the world than a man's mouth.
But I know that when they drink too much, their credibility is still high.
I happened to see the short message when my husband was very close to me. When he saw the message he sent, he was obviously very unhappy and asked about his situation. I knew that he was mainly afraid that I would be with others, including in the classmate group before, and some boys said similar things to me half-jokingly, and he also saw them, so he often checked my mobile phone in the future.
At first I was a little disgusted and resentful. I had been awkward for a few days, but later I stopped sticking to it. I thought it might be because I cared too much about me. Anyway, I sometimes look at his phone player. If I am clear, I will clear myself. Let him go.
On Valentine's Day, that colleague gave me flowers again
I was not there when he sent it, so I put it under my desk. I thought about it, but I didn't send it back, and of course I didn't take it home. I didn't want him to have an illusion, but I just felt that if I returned it in person, I was afraid that the impact would be worse, and my colleagues would be very awkward in the future. Why not explain if I had the opportunity?
Every time I attend a class reunion, my husband is not very happy, although he didn't stop him.
At a party, I met my college partner. It turned out that he broke up after going abroad.
Just returned to China and got married
Later he called me several times to have dinner, and my husband was a little unhappy
But my husband only thought it was my classmate who liked me, and he didn't know that he was my former partner.
He wants to get along with ordinary friends, I know what he wants to continue to develop, I didn't agree, I always feel that there is no simple friendship between men and women. If there is, at least one party is secretly in love with the other party
Among all my emotional experiences, my ex-boyfriend and I have the deepest relationship. It can be said that it is unforgettable, and I guess it will never forget it forever.
It is the boyfriend whom I had a relationship with a few days before my husband got married. How could I not miss him? Occasionally I remembered the scene of our ex-boyfriend. I deliberately refused to meet him. After getting married, I only called twice. The last time I contacted him, he was not married yet. He said he wanted to wait for me to try and always wanted to see me.
I didn't want to delay him, so I didn't contact him again
After getting married, I insisted on not seeing him. It’s not that I was too heartless. I am really afraid that after seeing him, I will not be able to control myself, so I will never want to separate from him again. That will hurt us not only. It’s better to miss us than to meet each other. You can’t support each other and forget each other in the world.
What was in the past will not come back, and even if it comes back, it will not be perfect
Can't see it, just carry it on your back
If you can't let go, remember
I can't bear it, so I keep it
One day I can't carry it, so I can see it
Can't remember it, so I let it go
Can't keep it anymore, so I'm willing to give it up
Cherish the people in front of you and do what you are in front of you
My husband said that he was just having fun with other women. Indeed, he has never found that he has a fixed lover so far. He has never thought about divorced me, and he has never mentioned divorced me when he quarreled with me.
I filed for divorce, he firmly opposed it
As long as I find that my husband has other women, I will definitely care, otherwise he will have the illusion that I let him casually. Good men are praised by others, not by others.
Since you are married, no matter how good or bad he is mine. Unless I don’t want it, no one can snatch it away, because I have heard many people say that no matter whether you remarry, you rarely find better than before.
My husband is good to me and my family, and I love me, but I just want to spend some time. Although I don’t share the same language and don’t communicate much, how can I be perfect?
I want to maintain this marriage
I don't want to cheat, nor do I want my husband to cheat, even if love slowly turns into only family love in the end
A friend once asked me, "My husband cheated on me, and I have never followed anyone after marriage. I really don't want to do it or I have never met someone I like."
I think there are two things, one is not. Men have lovers and women have a sense of guilt.
Another thing I can't accept is that there is no emotion, most men love, and most women love it because of love
An ancient Greek philosopher said that I forgot who it is: human speed is divided into two types, one is sensory and the other is spiritual. The sensory speed is short-lived and can never be obtained enough. The spiritual speed is lasting and can be obtained enough.
Another important point is that it may be difficult for me to meet someone who makes me so moved.
I wrote a passage before, and every time I think about it, I feel a lot of emotion: Everyone may meet four people in their life, the first one is yourself, the second one is the person you love the most, the third one is the person you love the most, and the fourth one is the person who spends his life together.
Life loves to joke the most, and the one you love the most often does not choose you; the one you love the most is often not what you love the most; and the one who ends up spending your life with you is not what you love the most or what you love the most, but the person who appears at the most suitable time
Who to live with, how to live with, how long, some people are because of love, some are because of material things, some are because of appearance, some are because of futures, and some are because of pressure. When you choose, you realize that the most important thing in love is not to surging love, sharing joys and sorrows, but not to leave
The one who has been with you for the longest is the one who loves you the most; the one who has been with you for the longest is the deepest love. What is the most important thing in life? I think it is freedom and true love.
Without freedom of body and mind, nothing else means. Freedom depends on gains and losses. Doing what you do is not freedom. Only by doing what you do and not doing can you gain true freedom. True feelings must be exchanged with sincerity. True feelings may not necessarily be exchanged with true feelings, but true feelings must be exchanged with sincerity.
Feelings are mutual, there is not much to take for granted and for no reason in the world, the only one who is happier than being loved is to love
Deeply ingrained family affection, plain friendship, and unforgettable love constitute our emotional world. Family affection is an innate fate. We cannot choose, and we are most unavoidable to avoid it. We need to take care of it.
Friendship is tolerant, love is selfish, friendship is as plain as water, and its sincerity and tolerance can be better compromised.
The selfishness, understanding, tolerance and unyielding love is easier to be unforgettable
No matter what kind of relationship it is, love is the least waiting and the most capable of waiting. If love is in front of you, wait for a second, love is long, if love is at the end, waiting for a lifetime is short
The three types of people that need to be cherished the most in this world: friends who help you in time, who are willing to accompany you through poor women, and who will tolerate your men in everything.
I have also done some things that do not conform to universal values. I either want to be wrong or wrong, and there is no need to find reasons to hide it. It's just that I'm more private, I didn't write it.
My experiences are actually not worth mentioning at all, but why do I need to write them out? I think it is not to relieve stress, nor to make people sensational
Maybe there is a little bit of reflection and self-analysis. There are many things. Only when the distance is getting farther and farther, can you look back and see it clearly.
People are very complicated, and everyone has different aspects, but overall I like to use people downward and people's hearts upward
Let's explain
Life is neither long nor short. How can you live without a standard answer? Why don’t you spend your life the way you like?
If God destined us to be small people, then try to be worthy of our relatives and friends, be worthy of ourselves, and not hurt others
![[Incestuous Novels] My story with my cousin Wu - Married woman, mature woman](/templates/nvshen/themes/img/thumb_1.png)