I have no memories of my mother.
Or there are, before I can remember it.Milky white shadows, some unexplained musty smell, and warm, soft touch.
The childhood memory is like a big dream. It disappears before the age of five, and then the smell and shadow will emerge when it is not easy to detect, like grass sprouting in the cracks of the rocks, scratching its toes itchy.
That's all.
But she left behind some books, dirty waste boxes, stuffed and threw them into the cement grid next to the coal pool.
"Three Musketeers", "Anna Karenina", "The Red Letter" and "The Descend the Pacific", and so on.
My whole childhood was spent in a pile of books, which brought great convenience to my cowardly and lazy father.He could lock me in the house with confidence and step onto the used phoenix Huáng bicycle to the dance hall.
He seems to be a person who can do nothing.He had read a lot of books, but it was useless. He just stayed in this dilapidated and state-owned factory and repeated the same labor as others.
I heard that with the books in his belly, he could be the deputy director of the workshop.But he was always mediocre and was lazy for ten more minutes during work breaks or when going to the toilet, so everyone was not in good condition.
I didn't save much money, but my family had a lot of spun floral shirts and a pair of artificial leather shoes.
Single men don’t have to live.On the day he received his salary, he would buy two shiny braised pig tails and stuff one into my hand.The next day, I could also eat a mushroom roast chicken leg.
But it was troublesome at the end of the month, and the noodles with boiled water were not even a decent dish.
He instigated me to get into the yard of a coworker's house and lift the pickle jar. When I was discovered, I would slap me twice in the face.
After three or five times, others saw the clues, and their reputation became even worse.
One day, it will be time for him to turn over.
The overseas Chinese brother who went abroad returned home and attracted foreign investment to the factory on the verge of rotting, surrounded by officials like buzzing like flies.
In the early 1990s, what a big deal.
I don’t know what the original factory did, but later it was built an air compressor accessories factory.
With the face of his elder brother, he soared into the sky and became the deputy factory director.
But in my eyes, my father was not so ecstatic.
He is still the lazy man who is intoxicated with eating, drinking and having fun, but now he has more room for squandering.
It is not strange that his ancestors have the ability to send a child overseas.
But in the past, English was still a shocking technique.
The foreign equipment landed, and the instructions filled with letters were thrown on the table, and he was the only one who could read the above words.
But he still did not win any prestige or dignity for himself.
Because his greatest achievement was not to become the deputy factory director, but to jump out of the window of someone else's bedroom in his underwear, and was chased by his husband, who was an ordinary worker, through the entire factory more than once.
He didn't seem to care much about his face and reputation, just like he didn't care about me.
I'm not a regular visitor to the school.
Sometimes I get a lot of fun or get some new books, and I don’t want to go to class.
In the primary school of the factory, the teacher, as an employee of the factory, could only give a few tactful words to the deputy factory director.
If he hadn't heard of it, the teacher would have to give up.
Relying on the name of the deputy factory director's father, I have the right to speak out among my children; he spends a lot of money, so I often get a full two yuan ticket as pocket money.
At that time, I was still ignorant, but I tasted the power and wealth that other teenagers could not touch in advance.
So, those rules that make people become sheep were not injected into my brain early.
Maybe it's smarter than others, and it doesn't take much effort to get into junior high school.But I no longer read books, nor can I take the echoes of the chants in the classroom into my ears.
The school with more than 1,000 people is neatly kept in a small gap between the bench and the wooden table, and cannot move.
I came to a strange world.There is a giant beast there that swallows itself and leads to order.
The terror and distinct levels that are prohibited are enough to curb the originally naughty scattering.But there was a bug that crawled into my pants when I was thirteen.
Maybe it was because I ate well that the insect in my body woke up very early.
Blood flowed through the chest and abdomen, and the flood from the mountains bombarded the dam and ended abruptly.
I sat between people, like a long beef stuffed into rotten pork. I wanted to open my carapace, but I could only squirm unwillingly.
The insects that used to only flap their wings before morning peeing are now struggling like a dying under the school pants in linen.It tried to break through the rough and sandy shady confinement, but was pressed so hard that it could not breathe.
Just as I sat in this strange room one day and surrounded a group of strange children, sucking the pungent chalk powder into my lungs.
Stand up, bow, sit down, and then the world's forty minutes of solidification.
Only primates waving their arms on the podium can get rid of this time.
It would stare at me with my yellow-green eyes as I got up, as if I would reach out and tear my face the next second.
I want to go to the bathroom.I bent over, instinctively covering up the bloated lower body material.
They are like sharing the same textbook to learn how to scold, such as what to do during class!Or you are not allowed to go to pee your pants.
But this time, it glared at me for three seconds and then turned its head towards the door, so I fled.
The fat and tall child behind the diagonally screamed suddenly.
He is setting up a clothes drying rod!Hahahahahahahaha!
The thick and sharp laughter stirred up the loving laughter of all the other children.The deafening laughter covered my whole body like a hornet coming out of my nest.
The accumulated depression and anger finally exploded, and they were filled with thick blood into their brains.
I rushed over and knocked him to the ground with the man and the chair.
I followed Han Zhao's appearance, squeezed the middle finger and clenched it into a fist, and used all my strength to hit him on the face, once, twice, three times.
He screamed heart-wrenchingly.
Nose bleeding, tears, saliva splattered on the patent-skinned wood floor.
I punched and punched, and the flesh and bones blew.
The anger seemed to be unable to control myself. I was like a cockfighting suddenly in a cage, raising the dirty feathers and chicken manure all over the sky.
It finally rushed over, tore my collar and pulled me away from the child with all its strength.
Perhaps it had never seen such a fierce student. It covered the fat man's bloody nose with a handkerchief, left quickly, and asked me to stand at the door with a loud voice.
After it took him to disappear from the corner of the corridor, I ran to the other side of the stairs.
I know that when the children in the classroom come out, each of them will have gloating and sarcastic sarcasm in their eyes.
It was like a sharp blade that I had never accepted or could not accept, so I ran away and ran out of the mouth of this huge beast.
The shame under the crotch did not dissipate, but running made it even more rampant.
I ran all the way to Houdian, the brick yard by the river.
I panted and turned over the pile of bricks covered with dust, hid behind the brick nest, pierced it shamefully, and bent it down hard.
That thing would rather die than surrender.
I pressed it with a solid blue brick against it and squeezed it hard.
The blood of the rampage made it swell more and more, and the pain of being crushed was crushed by soreness.
I fought with the giant python, and this giant python was connected to my flesh and blood.
The little snake it gave birth to penetrate into its stomach from its crotch and into its chest, biting its heart and lungs, and its legs and fingers were numb, making me panting as if I was poisonous.
It will surrender, and I will surrender.
It became soft, like a fat leech sprinkled with salt.After winning the battle, I climbed out of the brick nest and went home.
The primate was waiting for me at home. It stood behind his father, stretching out his pointed fingers at me and baring his teeth.
That was the first time I saw shame on my father's face.He held the fire hook for sucking the stove in his hand, which was covered with the smell of coal and iron, and swung it on my face.
I was shocked.It's not because of the pain, nor because of his anger.
I was frightened by my father's changes at this time.
I may have one less piece in my heart than others, because I have never envied my neighbor's hot living room and kitchen, and the stewed soup made by other people's mother.
To me, my father’s closeness and separation is probably love.I haven't tasted anything else.
Now he let me taste it.When he was about to be forty, he suddenly felt scared and ashamed. I had to make such a guess after being a competent father for more than ten years.
But he didn't know anything.He has been independent all his life, fearing to learn all the things his mediocre father would do.And at that time, I didn't know anything.
He used to be like a big bird.Ignoring my love, I just put my big and thick wings on me.
But now, he began to peck at me.
The long bruise on Heng Lin's face became the answer to my sudden realization. It turned out that the big bird had never liked me, and he hated me.
I didn't expect that I was always hated.I shouted for mercy, and the dark fire hook fell five more times, breaking those carefree memories into pieces.
The story says that in order to put on a shoe, someone cut his feet into the shape of a shoe.
He cut me into the same shape as everyone on this day, and I was stuffed into the mold and blood flowed out.
Back in the classroom, I sat there, and it was satisfied on the podium.
But no one dared to laugh at me anymore. The fat child broke the bridge of his nose and broke the courage of others.No enemies, no friends.I was treated as a sea anemone, and I would not sting if I stayed far away.
I don't need them to be friends.Han Zhao ran into me head-on on the street and was startled by the injuries on my face.
I'll fuck!Who beats you?!
Han Zhao has dropped out of school for two years and sells snatches in an alley diagonally opposite the seafood market.
He made some money, and he wore a fashionable leather jacket and a pair of big leather boots.
He was strong and thin, and his stature was bulging on his body. It was ridiculous to think about it now, but that era was enough to make a young man and a half arrogant.
My dad.
These two words immediately made Han Zhao feel angry.He turned around and accompanied me, and bought two oranges at the street stall.He peeled off his skin, stuffed it into his mouth a few times, broke two pieces and sent it to my face.
I don't want it.
Eat it and eat it.
Han Zhao had thick hands and thick feet, and the orange petals in his hand were hard on my mouth.I made him feel sore in the toothache, and I had no choice but to open my mouth.
The oranges are not good, they are extremely sour.But we both ate.
Han Zhao's family is also from a factory.My father fell into the cauldron and disappeared.When his father died and his mother got married, he lived alone in the factory, and no one drove him away.He and I are both freaks, and freaks have been close since childhood.
Han Zhao didn't say anything, so he accompanied me all the way, each of them ate an orange.After eating the orange, he slapped me in the back and turned around and continued to walk his.
The orange was put into my stomach, and suddenly I felt hungry, and my face finally hurt.
I started to stumble.In a class of more than fifty people, I lay down in the forty people and became invisible people.
I continued to fight with the giant python.
Since birth, I have conquered my hands, my feet, my eyes, my mouth.Every part of the body is mine, so natural and so natural.
But it is not, it is like a living animal.
Most of the time, it falls asleep; but sometimes, it wakes up.
When walking, when the trousers are rubbing; when the cold water is poured in big mouths after running; when Han Zhao's house, listening to the large tape recorder plays out soft songs...
I don't know why, and I'm too ashamed to ask anyone questions.
After it woke up, its throat became dry and thirsty, as if it was driving me to eat raw meat and drink blood.I wanted to control it, but it controlled me little by little.
Later, the hot blood became more and more intense, and even when it was sleeping, there would be a no-reason heat flowing in its body.I became irritable, irritable, and a fire that was about to hurt.
The unmanned brick field became my breathing territory.I piled bricks high, from all directions, and I hid them in the middle, as if lying in a well.
Taking off his pants, his penis stood up straight, without the tension, it pointed at the sky freely, as if it would breathe heavily.
I lay flat, my hands and feet stretched out into big words, no longer afraid of shame.
At this moment, I and it coexist peacefully.
There were dog barking in my ears, but there were no dogs in the brick field.
I put on my pants, climbed up on bricks, and looked at that place.
The brick yard is close to the river, and broken bricks are thrown all over the floor by the river.She staggered on the pile of waste bricks, almost tilting several times.
There was a puppy in the river, flapping vigorously, but it was not moving in the water.She rolled up her trouser legs, stepped into the river with her bare white feet, and leaned over step by step.
The river water exceeded the knees, and the rolled-up pants became useless.She didn't care, so she reached out to hold the puppy's belly, untied the broken woven bag that was wrapped around her feet, and got ashore step by step.
The mud on her pants drizzled on her calves, and the snow was run over by the wheels.She limped when her feet were pierced by broken bricks in the river.
She piled up the dirty fertilizer bags, put the puppy in, and pulled a large asbestos board to put it on the brick to make a nest for shelter from the wind and rain.
She left, but came back after a while, holding half a steamed bun in her hand.She fed it and went home happily.
I've never seen her like that before.When she was in the class, she was a cold and indifferent study committee member and would neatly tie the big red cross on our homework for the teacher, without any pity.
I sneaked over and looked at the dog through the gap in the asbestos board.The dog recognized good people and bad people, and it shrank in and grinned at me.
The little yellow dog was made of black and bare by mud and water, and was in a mess. He wanted to bite, but he didn't know what to bite.Hidden in a pile of bricks, no one cares about it, if you run freely, you will fall into the river and then drown.
I want to vomit.I wanted to pull it out, then use all my strength and throw it into the river.
I stood, the python under my crotch lowered its head, and the flames burning blood vessels were extinguished.I left it in the nest and didn't look at it again.
I know her name is Fang Yan.
Of course I can call out the names of everyone in the class, but those names are symbols, namely height, fat and thin, male and female, hot and cold.
But she is no longer a symbol, I know what she did, not everyone will do that.
The brick field is quite large. I leaned out of my pile of bricks and looked at her from a distance, but she wouldn't see me.She came every day to feed the puppy something.After she leaves, I will also go and look at the dog for a few more times.
The dog gradually became less afraid of me. It just hummed while eating, for fear that I would grab its leftovers.
I still hate that dog. When it puts two small paws on my legs, I push it away with my knees.
It became brave.It would follow her two steps as she walked, send her, and then turn around and run a few steps back to see if I had come.
I'm late.
Several vocational high school students dragged it out from under the asbestos board, laughed and poured water into its mouth with an empty beer bottle.It howled and whimpered, and its belly was suffocated.
A man's run-up two steps and kicked his stomach.
I grabbed the brick and rushed over, jumped up and smashed him in the head.He fell all of a sudden, bleeding from his ears.
They grabbed my arm desperately, and the joints on their hands were trapped in my flesh. The man got up and kicked me to the ground.
I spit out the things in my stomach all over the floor, but I still hugged one leg, bit it up regardless of the matter, and kicked the head again.
I had a fight and was not afraid of pain, but I couldn't get up soon.
Stop hitting!Someone called out, he was the little brother of Han Zhao!I've seen him!
It scattered in a hurry.
I wiped off the blood that covered my eyes with my hands and sat on the ground to breathe.
I turned my head and saw her stunned face.
She cried.The eyes were filled with crystal clear liquid, but there was no sound.
She walked over, squatted, and touched the puppy's head.The puppy's mouth was covered in blood, his eyelids trembled a few times, and he did not open it again.She put her hand on the puppy's head and didn't move for a long time.
I slowly stretched my injured leg, picked up a wooden stick, and dug a hole in the land.Then I walked over, pushed her hand away, picked up the puppy's body, and walked towards the pit.
She followed.She and I buried it.
Fang Yan and I sat together in the dog burying place for a long time, and it was almost dark.
Fang Yan took out his handkerchief and wiped the blood from my face.
You dip some water.I felt so painful when she wiped it, and raised my finger to Xiaohe.
If the river water is not clean, it will be infected.Her voice was hoarse.
I was silent for a while and couldn't help but say: You know a lot.
She said: I want to be a doctor in the future.
That's why you saved the dog.I seemed to understand something, but I didn't understand anything.
Did you see it?Fang Yan was a little surprised.
I nodded.I've been watching.But I didn't say anything more.
Be a doctor, can you save people?I asked again.
Otherwise?
What if it were them?Are you saving them too?I gritted my teeth and asked at the mound of dirt where the puppy was buried beside me.
I heard Fang Yan sobbing, but when she spoke, I didn't hear her weakness.
They don't know what they are doing.
I don't understand why she can forgive them so easily, and suddenly I feel that everything I do is meaningless.
I stood up in fear and turned my head to walk home.
Fang Yan called my name behind. I didn't even know she would remember my name.
Zuo Huan, see you tomorrow.
I know men very well.
I can understand that my father is as weird as my spirit and as high as Han Zhao.
I can see through the naughtiness, despicability, cowardice and obscenity of the boys in the class.
Because I am a man, I can imagine it.
But I can't imagine what Fang Yan looks like.It was not until she called out my name that I realized that there was actually a woman in this world.
It’s not that I don’t know, but that I didn’t look at it or think about it.After all, I have never even had a mother in my life.
I was confused in the morning, and it was the same.
But this time, the giant python seemed to have turned into a poisonous snake. It did not strangle my neck, but instead poked out from under my crotch, slid along the side abdomen toward my chest, then swam onto my cheeks, rubbed my eyebrows with fine scales.
I seemed to see Fang Yan's blood-filled lips moving gently, calling me Zuo Huan.
Suddenly, I felt very excited and looked for the toilet in panic. My muscles were tense, afraid that a drop would leak out.
But that was not something I imagined, but a symbol that I had never imagined.
The snake is no longer a snake, it has become my flesh and blood again, and it is finally conquered, after a spasm-like roar.
The burning heat that rolled in the abdomen for a long time seemed to have found all explanations, and they had already expanded to an uncontrollable extent.When they left the body, I vaguely got the answer.
It is smooth and sweet, as if the soul has ushered in a brand new structure, and the numbness of fingers and toes is like injecting fresh sweet honey water.
I woke up, got out of bed, secretly unscrewed the water dragon, and began to wash my underwear.
I got the answer, so I thought I had won the war with the giant python.
But I was too young at that time, and its surrender was just a conspiracy. It no longer fought with me, but became a soft bewitching voice in my ears.
Men have to fight against its bewitching for the rest of their lives.
I knew Fang Yan was secretly looking at me because I was staring at her almost all day.
I couldn't satisfy myself, I wanted her to look at me a few more times.
Fang Yan is very outstanding. She meticulously acts as the most dazzling student in the eyes of primates.
There are many like her, but she is different from others. She knows that it is what she wants, so she never works hard because of flattery.
But I am very flattering.
Since I was a child, my father threw it into the pile of books. I wrote the article in a very good manner with a little care and received a few praises from the teacher.
It’s even more important to say that English is, after all, I have the foundation of my family.
Unlike now, when students had just had twenty-six letters in junior high school, I could read high school-level sentences fluently.
But I was indifferent to the object I flattered about.
The biggest preferential treatment Fang Yan gave is the unblocked smile.
When my eyes were facing her, she always smiled like this.
But for this, this is her greatest courage.
At that time, when a boy and a girl said a single word, it was a burst of teasing and ridicule.
Girls have to face malicious and filthy words.
However, the children in the grid have grown up, and the air in the classroom has gradually become thicker.
Everyone seems to have entered a stage of being ready to move. When they laugh at others loudly, they also have a despicable desire in their hearts.
Several couples were accidentally caught by primates, and they were in chaos.
But the children still make progress, and no one can go against nature.
Perhaps, the ostentatiousness of those guys gave Fang Yan new courage.
She came to the brick field again, her throat trembling and she called me.
Just like she has already calculated that I will be here.And I was indeed there because I had fantasized that she would come again one day.
I ran out of the place I was used to passing the time, my heart pounding.There was no one around, but I found that I was countless times more timid than Yan.
I didn't even dare to look at her directly.
Which high school did you get into?The girl stood under the sun, dazzlingly white.
I haven't thought about this question yet.Han Zhao has asked me to do small business with him more than once, so I have the idea of finishing junior high school.
I want to take the No. 1 exam, you and me.She didn't act politely and said firmly.
I can't pass the exam.
You can.
How do you know...
Women mature too early than men.Fang Yan was no different from now on, except that she had fewer layers of damage-proof shells.She seemed to know everything, she knew my eyes were full of her.
Or maybe she didn't know that it was me who arrogantly fabricated her illusion.She just has the power of faith, like the reclamation bird.
Don't you have many books?Do you have "Shelmes" in your home?She suddenly asked again.
have.You want to see it?
I'll give you some lessons and lend me a book to read.
Fang Yan ran to my house.I clumsily dragged out a large cardboard box from under the bed and picked up books for her.Her eyes were shiny, and the look she looked at me was a little different.
Have you read it all?
Read it when I was a kid.
She suddenly smiled embarrassedly and sat next to the coffee table with a copy of "Reeds in the Wind".
I wrote the exercises silently until there was an ununclear knot, and then poked her arm with my pen.Fang Yan came over and explained it carefully.
Things in junior high school are hard to come by. She said it, and it flows through the flow.Before her father returned home, she ran away with her book.
She came every few days, changing books one by one, and most of the semester passed like this, and those bad courses were quickly covered by me.
She and I were separated by a coffee table and memorizing each other's questions. We were serious and could not tell anyone who broke into the house.
My father found out, but he pretended not to know.
The place where the two men live has a little more fragrance as a girl. How can I hide it?
One day, I saw his head swaying outside the window with a squinted eye. I was shocked and told Fang Yan to leave quickly.
But he didn't expect that he would come back after turning to Hei Tian outside, without mentioning a single word.
So Fang Yan came more times, and I didn't move away when I secretly approached her.
Soon, the scores on the paper were already like smoke and the teachers left me and her with only a smile.I was no longer careful when I stood with her because no one dared to stab our backs anymore.
This right was not won by my ferocity and fists.
It was Fang Yan who planned everything. She understood the rules very well. She knew that as long as we reached this point, we would no longer be afraid of the grass growing in the gutter.
We get less exercises and more free reading.She held the book and reached out from the coffee table, and casually hooked the back of my hand with her little finger.
I quickly grabbed her hand indulgently.
She looked up at me, pursed her lips, suppressed her smug smile, continued to read, holding her hands tightly with me.
I gently pulled her, and she happily responded, and walked around the coffee table and sat next to me.My arms and I were pressed together, warm, weak and boneless hands were like clouds.
In the days before, the thing under the crotch had struggled countless times, an unforgivable blasphemy.
I was afraid that she would see it, so I could only concentrate on putting my pen, pinch my knuckles to the point of paleness, and pinch my thighs a few more times.
I thought it would still embarrass me this time, but it didn't.
So the answer I got was distracted again. I don't understand what was wrong. It was entrenched there and was indifferent, but its forehead was wet like a cat that was only wet in the rain.
You don't have to work hard to be a good student.Fang Yan suddenly said.
Do you want me to be a bad student?I was confused.
No good or bad.Her voice was calm, and the hand that was holding me was shaking like an electric shock. You are different from others, don't be them.
Then why did you take me to do the questions?
There are indeed some things in this world that are more important than others. For us, scores are such things.
You can do it well without any effort. If you don’t do it, it will be a loss.Fang Yan was a little incoherent, but I understood.
If I don’t be a good student or a bad student, then what should I do?
Just be yourself!Fang Yan pinched my hand hard. Someone laughed at you, do you still remember that you hit him?
What's wrong?
I thought I was not afraid of blood. I wanted to be a doctor, but I was really scared by you that day.I don't know how dare you.Then you run away, so free, that's something I can never do.That day, I might have liked you.
Do you like me?I'm as stupid as a worm.
I like you.Fang Yan repeated the confession tremblingly, without retreating.
The warm water immersed me, the scene before me became blurred, and everything slowed down.
I pulled her arm and leaned over. She came to her senses and dodged in panic, only letting me kiss on the cheek.
She ran out of my house in panic, and her compulsive calmness had been shattered.I followed her like a lost dog.
Coincidentally, she actually ran all the way to the place where we buried our dogs.
She stopped panting and turned to look at me, her eyes flashing with huge fear and a ray of orange-red sunset.
I stood in front of her, not daring to walk forward, and begged all over my face.I was afraid that she would really run away, and the only one who could accept me was scared away by me.
Fang Yan struggled for a long time, and I don’t know if she thought I was pretty at that moment, just like she took out the puppy from the water.
She took a step towards me, and I rushed over with ecstasy and hugged her.Her hands and neck were cold.
Fang Yan, I can’t live without you.I said in her ear.
Didn’t you hold it all?There was a smile and a sigh in her voice.
Hiding in the small barriers of the siege of bricks, I kissed her mouth hard, she was as naked as she had no struggle or resistance.It was soft and soft as if I was sleeping on the Milky Way, and the stars were flashing in my mind.
Some things don't need to be learned.
My lips were pushed open to her lips, trying to kiss every corner of her. My teeth were bumping into each other and giggling. They were busy avoiding each other, their mouths opened and their tongues touched them gently, and they understood everything.
Fang Yan was not very shy. She put me on her body like a sea, letting me suck and lick her back, and letting me rub the clothes on her back to wrinkle and look undesirable.
She responded slowly with her tongue to my madness, like a rein that trapped the beast.
But she couldn't breathe in the end, timidly avoiding my pursuit and breathing heavily.But I continued to arch on her neck, greedily obsessed with the smell of every inch of her skin.
And she is also absorbing a wisp of my soul, the unrestrainedness she longs for.
You are so much taller than me.Fang Yan hugged me, leaned her head against my shoulder, and her rapid breath filled my ears.
We all grow very fast.
In two years, the hormones secreted shattered our bones, muscles and organs inch by inch, urging them to be intact again.
Theseus' ship sailed into the deep sea, leaving behind a self that we no longer know.
The high school entrance examination is over, and Fang Yan and I get what we want.
Those dirty and cramped memories are picked off one by one by one by one by one by one by one by one by us and thrown into the mud.
The future is like a vast plain, you can run to the fullest no matter which direction you go.
During the two-month holiday, there was no longer any restraint, and Fang Yan rarely looked cool.She came to my house and hugged me from behind. She stayed there for a whole day, with her slightly swollen lips before leaving.
The unrestrained temperature is hotter than the fire. In the steaming summer, the two of us faded our only reserve and had each other.
Being arrogant, rude, and selfish are not wrong.Only by being bewitched by that poisonous snake made me unable to forgive myself.
I ran out with Fang Yan in my arms, and was extremely frightened and smashed Han Zhao's door.
Han Zhao drove his taxi on the road, and Fang Yan's blood stained the white backseat cover.She lay on me, her lips turned white, but she touched my face with her hands and whispered to me, "It's okay, it's okay."
The bad start.
Later she was really fine, but I didn't dare to see her.Fang Yan acted indifferently, coaxed me with her unique calmness, and rubbed the bumps in my heart.
As stupid as me.
The first time she imagined turned into a terrifying pain and shame. I don’t know how deep the scars she left in her heart, how she survived the doctor’s contemptuous consultation, how she concealed the suspicion at home, and what she really experienced.
The first thing Fang Yan did after she came back was to heal my wounds.Facing my shrinkage and guilt, she still came over as if nothing had happened, hugged me, and kissed my ears as if it were.
I asked her, it hurts so why didn't I stop.
She said, I thought it hurts so much the first time.
I asked her, how could you bear it?
She said, because I love you Ah.
That year, Comet Sumeklevi rushed to Jupiter in a decisive manner, ending its roaming in endless darkness.
At a speed of 210,000 kilometers per hour, the scar it left on Jupiter is enough to swallow a planet.It is one with it forever.
She stroked my hair and hooked my lower lip with her tongue. Zuo Huan, forget it, forgot to hurt me, you shouldn't remember that kind of thing, you just need to remember how much I love you, I just need to remember how much you love me.
No one really spoke.She lifted up the short-sleeved school uniform, exposed the frozen pond, continued to move up, pushing a lotus leaf apart, and there was a white fish hidden under it.
Fang Yan thrust forward and said tremblingly: Look.
I touched her only twice.When she was truly presented to me for the first time, I almost became a beast again.
Holding the swelling of my temples, I bit her and tried to control myself from not exerting that force.
But Fang Yan still screamed and pressed my head tightly against his chest, as if he was afraid that I would shake my head and tear her off.
It was a miracle creation that men did not have, and thus gained great magic.
I was lovingly and intoxicated, licking and sucking, not understanding why there are such wonderful holy traces in the world.
It's like a kind of jealousy beyond imagination, jealous of what you don't have.
After tasting one, I pushed away the cover on the other side and threw it in, and the rain and dew were evenly mixed.
Fang Yan still felt so painful, but she hugged my head and smiled with tears: Do you like it so much?
I heard her voice whispering, and then I let go, kiss her tears, and then kiss her whole body one by one.
I kissed her until the grassy place and reached out to pull her waist, and then she forced her to pull her up.
No, no.It will take some more days to keep it, and you won't mess around.
That was a day when I couldn't disobey.But before I could move, she took off my sweat-soaked vest.
Fang Yan licked my neck and chest, licking it all the way.I was like I was over the electricity, and I didn't dare to move around, just like a prey that had lost resistance was being smelled by a beast.
My penis had been stoked by the blood of blood. Fang Yan put on the buttons of my pants and let it jump out. She slapped it, making me sore that I bared my teeth and cracked my mouth.
It's all because it makes me almost hurt.
Then Fang Yan kissed it too, and I pushed her shoulders and refused to let her go. She raised her eyes and glanced at me, and she was charming and provocative.
The lips were pressed on, gently pursed, surprisingly slippery.
It once fought against the rough trouser cloth, hard bricks and dry firewood fingers in anger, but it had never been so close.
My thighs twitched involuntarily, trembling with pleasure.
Fang Yan kissed it twice and then took it in ignorantly. No one taught him, and it was natural.My gritted teeth expression was encouragement, she knew she had done it right.
So her tongue started to move and sucked vigorously into her mouth.My teeth trembled and I held her head and raised my waist.
Most of the penis was thrusting into her mouth, and Fang Yan let out a few retries.I didn't dare to move anymore and rubbed her face.She looked at me with red eyes, very gentle, shook her head, and sucked in emotion again
My whole body was itchy and numb, but I was reluctant to poke her.
Fang Yan seemed to have realized it. She stopped swallowing it deeply, and shrank backwards, as if she was deliberately seducing me.
I was soaked in saliva and suddenly it became cold. I couldn't control myself anymore and finally straightened my waist again.
Fang Yan followed my strength and swallowed me hard.She endured the swelling and pain in her throat, and her thrustling neck turned into tenderness and sweetness.
She serves all her body and mind without hesitation.
My heart filled her, and the love that was rushing and agitation was left unrestrained.
If love is holy, holiness is definitely not white. The salty and fishy strong hit Fang Yan's throat, causing her to cough.
Fang Yan covered her mouth, her palms were sticky white.She looked at me and swallowed, as if she told me that none of my parts was dirty.
She was wrong, my purity was only everything and a moment that entered her body.
I don't know that love is such a thing, nor do she know.That thing is even more violent than the depression, loneliness and anger I used to be.
I long to be with her all the time, to touch her, to enter her, to the tongue, fingers, and penis, to rub her into my body, and to cast her with blood and flesh.
But in a new high school, everything is new, a new house, a new person, especially a new person.
I don't care about anything, I only care about Fang Yan.But can Fang Yan not care, as a girl?
A sunny and handsome boy became her deskmate, smiling and chatting with her.Fang Yan nodded politely to him and smiled at him.
I pulled him into the bathroom during physical education class, slammed him into the bathroom, and threw him to the ground, stepping on his head one by one.
He returned to the classroom in a mess, with paper stuffed in his nose and mud on his hair.Fang Yan looked at him in surprise, turned her head to look at me, she knew everything.She would see that my eyes were like manic lions.
The boy had his tail between his legs and stopped laughing with her or talking to her anymore.He treated her as non-existent, and all the boys began to treat her as non-existent.
After school, she caught up with me who had walked away alone in the brick field and said to me: You don’t have to be like this, I am yours alone.
I turned her around, turned my back to me, and pressed her against the brick wall.
Is that true?Is it true?I made a mean sound in her ear, biting her ear and her neck.
He lifted up his skirt, pulled off his pants, and stuffed his angry cock into her body.
That was our fourth time, and Fang Yan was so wet that she was faster than ever.
This was the first time, my dick suddenly poked to the bottom and splashed everywhere.
Her legs immediately became soft and she slid down with a whine.
I wrapped my belly around her to prevent her from falling down. I pressed against her back and tried hard like a pile, which made her ponytail spread.
Fang Yan held the wall with one hand and grabbed me tightly with the other hand and pinched her wrist.She turned her head tremblingly, looked at me and said: You don’t believe me.
The jealous tongue of flame was mostly extinguished by the bright color in her eyes.I couldn't attack anymore, and I stood there at a loss.
How could I not believe her?If even Fang Yan doesn't believe it, who is left in the world?
Fang Yan turned around with difficulty, climbed onto my shoulders with both hands, and hung them on me weakly.
I'm afraid someone will take you away and take you from your sight.Nothing can do, I can't stand it.
I was full of nonsense and didn't express my meaning, but Fang Yan understood it.
No one gives, no one gives.Fang Yan said softly, without any ups and downs, like a last word.
She kissed me, hooked one leg on my waist, and pushed my cock with her lower abdomen.
I fucked in again, and she screamed to the bottom of her heart, like the most naked confession.The love juice rolled along the inner side of her thighs, drop by drop, clumps, and the land became muddy.
Only in our fourth time did Fang Yan have the first climax in his life.
She bit my arm and cried, but her waist twisted into the easiest way I thrust.
I was also surprisingly firm, as if I was going to burn a layer of mark on her uterus.
Fang Yan was fucked by me to the point of squirting. She screamed, and the water that was holding me against me suddenly poured out as I twitched. With a puff, the light rain drizzled.The flower room twitched rapidly, crushing my middle path to death.
White turbidity poured into her one by one, and Fang Yan and I hugged each other tightly.What I got was a hint of peace, and she took out her bright red heart.
Since then, Fang Yan has never rejected my unfair request.
In the bathroom, she gave me a blowjob and was seen. The rumors came, but she didn't hear them.
Then behind the warehouse, in the brick yard, in my house, in her house, and in her house, I will ask for it.
I thought she was enjoying it, but I didn't know that it was just her own flesh and blood, feed me.
Fang Yan is pregnant with our first one.
She secretly knocked it out without making any sound.Before I could recover, I was pregnant for a second time.
Her body was weak and her grades plummeted. I realized it later and regretted that I shouldn't have been there.
The bloody proof that Fang Yan gave to me with both hands finally dissolved my jealousy and suspicion.She woke me up from a childish child to a man.
Fang Yan failed to enjoy how the man she made would love her, and the plane to the other side had already fallen from the sky.
She hugged me and cried bitterly, as if she had foresaw the annihilated future.
I swear to her to give her everything, with my hands, from the other side of the sea.
Vows are like children's play.
There is no interruption of karma.
If you fall into this prison, from the first time you enter, to hundreds of thousands of kalpas, one day and one night, you will die and live thousands of lives, and you will not be able to stay in a moment in a thought, unless your karma is exhausted...
Only then can one be reborn.
Or there are, before I can remember it.Milky white shadows, some unexplained musty smell, and warm, soft touch.
The childhood memory is like a big dream. It disappears before the age of five, and then the smell and shadow will emerge when it is not easy to detect, like grass sprouting in the cracks of the rocks, scratching its toes itchy.
That's all.
But she left behind some books, dirty waste boxes, stuffed and threw them into the cement grid next to the coal pool.
"Three Musketeers", "Anna Karenina", "The Red Letter" and "The Descend the Pacific", and so on.
My whole childhood was spent in a pile of books, which brought great convenience to my cowardly and lazy father.He could lock me in the house with confidence and step onto the used phoenix Huáng bicycle to the dance hall.
He seems to be a person who can do nothing.He had read a lot of books, but it was useless. He just stayed in this dilapidated and state-owned factory and repeated the same labor as others.
I heard that with the books in his belly, he could be the deputy director of the workshop.But he was always mediocre and was lazy for ten more minutes during work breaks or when going to the toilet, so everyone was not in good condition.
I didn't save much money, but my family had a lot of spun floral shirts and a pair of artificial leather shoes.
Single men don’t have to live.On the day he received his salary, he would buy two shiny braised pig tails and stuff one into my hand.The next day, I could also eat a mushroom roast chicken leg.
But it was troublesome at the end of the month, and the noodles with boiled water were not even a decent dish.
He instigated me to get into the yard of a coworker's house and lift the pickle jar. When I was discovered, I would slap me twice in the face.
After three or five times, others saw the clues, and their reputation became even worse.
One day, it will be time for him to turn over.
The overseas Chinese brother who went abroad returned home and attracted foreign investment to the factory on the verge of rotting, surrounded by officials like buzzing like flies.
In the early 1990s, what a big deal.
I don’t know what the original factory did, but later it was built an air compressor accessories factory.
With the face of his elder brother, he soared into the sky and became the deputy factory director.
But in my eyes, my father was not so ecstatic.
He is still the lazy man who is intoxicated with eating, drinking and having fun, but now he has more room for squandering.
It is not strange that his ancestors have the ability to send a child overseas.
But in the past, English was still a shocking technique.
The foreign equipment landed, and the instructions filled with letters were thrown on the table, and he was the only one who could read the above words.
But he still did not win any prestige or dignity for himself.
Because his greatest achievement was not to become the deputy factory director, but to jump out of the window of someone else's bedroom in his underwear, and was chased by his husband, who was an ordinary worker, through the entire factory more than once.
He didn't seem to care much about his face and reputation, just like he didn't care about me.
I'm not a regular visitor to the school.
Sometimes I get a lot of fun or get some new books, and I don’t want to go to class.
In the primary school of the factory, the teacher, as an employee of the factory, could only give a few tactful words to the deputy factory director.
If he hadn't heard of it, the teacher would have to give up.
Relying on the name of the deputy factory director's father, I have the right to speak out among my children; he spends a lot of money, so I often get a full two yuan ticket as pocket money.
At that time, I was still ignorant, but I tasted the power and wealth that other teenagers could not touch in advance.
So, those rules that make people become sheep were not injected into my brain early.
Maybe it's smarter than others, and it doesn't take much effort to get into junior high school.But I no longer read books, nor can I take the echoes of the chants in the classroom into my ears.
The school with more than 1,000 people is neatly kept in a small gap between the bench and the wooden table, and cannot move.
I came to a strange world.There is a giant beast there that swallows itself and leads to order.
The terror and distinct levels that are prohibited are enough to curb the originally naughty scattering.But there was a bug that crawled into my pants when I was thirteen.
Maybe it was because I ate well that the insect in my body woke up very early.
Blood flowed through the chest and abdomen, and the flood from the mountains bombarded the dam and ended abruptly.
I sat between people, like a long beef stuffed into rotten pork. I wanted to open my carapace, but I could only squirm unwillingly.
The insects that used to only flap their wings before morning peeing are now struggling like a dying under the school pants in linen.It tried to break through the rough and sandy shady confinement, but was pressed so hard that it could not breathe.
Just as I sat in this strange room one day and surrounded a group of strange children, sucking the pungent chalk powder into my lungs.
Stand up, bow, sit down, and then the world's forty minutes of solidification.
Only primates waving their arms on the podium can get rid of this time.
It would stare at me with my yellow-green eyes as I got up, as if I would reach out and tear my face the next second.
I want to go to the bathroom.I bent over, instinctively covering up the bloated lower body material.
They are like sharing the same textbook to learn how to scold, such as what to do during class!Or you are not allowed to go to pee your pants.
But this time, it glared at me for three seconds and then turned its head towards the door, so I fled.
The fat and tall child behind the diagonally screamed suddenly.
He is setting up a clothes drying rod!Hahahahahahahaha!
The thick and sharp laughter stirred up the loving laughter of all the other children.The deafening laughter covered my whole body like a hornet coming out of my nest.
The accumulated depression and anger finally exploded, and they were filled with thick blood into their brains.
I rushed over and knocked him to the ground with the man and the chair.
I followed Han Zhao's appearance, squeezed the middle finger and clenched it into a fist, and used all my strength to hit him on the face, once, twice, three times.
He screamed heart-wrenchingly.
Nose bleeding, tears, saliva splattered on the patent-skinned wood floor.
I punched and punched, and the flesh and bones blew.
The anger seemed to be unable to control myself. I was like a cockfighting suddenly in a cage, raising the dirty feathers and chicken manure all over the sky.
It finally rushed over, tore my collar and pulled me away from the child with all its strength.
Perhaps it had never seen such a fierce student. It covered the fat man's bloody nose with a handkerchief, left quickly, and asked me to stand at the door with a loud voice.
After it took him to disappear from the corner of the corridor, I ran to the other side of the stairs.
I know that when the children in the classroom come out, each of them will have gloating and sarcastic sarcasm in their eyes.
It was like a sharp blade that I had never accepted or could not accept, so I ran away and ran out of the mouth of this huge beast.
The shame under the crotch did not dissipate, but running made it even more rampant.
I ran all the way to Houdian, the brick yard by the river.
I panted and turned over the pile of bricks covered with dust, hid behind the brick nest, pierced it shamefully, and bent it down hard.
That thing would rather die than surrender.
I pressed it with a solid blue brick against it and squeezed it hard.
The blood of the rampage made it swell more and more, and the pain of being crushed was crushed by soreness.
I fought with the giant python, and this giant python was connected to my flesh and blood.
The little snake it gave birth to penetrate into its stomach from its crotch and into its chest, biting its heart and lungs, and its legs and fingers were numb, making me panting as if I was poisonous.
It will surrender, and I will surrender.
It became soft, like a fat leech sprinkled with salt.After winning the battle, I climbed out of the brick nest and went home.
The primate was waiting for me at home. It stood behind his father, stretching out his pointed fingers at me and baring his teeth.
That was the first time I saw shame on my father's face.He held the fire hook for sucking the stove in his hand, which was covered with the smell of coal and iron, and swung it on my face.
I was shocked.It's not because of the pain, nor because of his anger.
I was frightened by my father's changes at this time.
I may have one less piece in my heart than others, because I have never envied my neighbor's hot living room and kitchen, and the stewed soup made by other people's mother.
To me, my father’s closeness and separation is probably love.I haven't tasted anything else.
Now he let me taste it.When he was about to be forty, he suddenly felt scared and ashamed. I had to make such a guess after being a competent father for more than ten years.
But he didn't know anything.He has been independent all his life, fearing to learn all the things his mediocre father would do.And at that time, I didn't know anything.
He used to be like a big bird.Ignoring my love, I just put my big and thick wings on me.
But now, he began to peck at me.
The long bruise on Heng Lin's face became the answer to my sudden realization. It turned out that the big bird had never liked me, and he hated me.
I didn't expect that I was always hated.I shouted for mercy, and the dark fire hook fell five more times, breaking those carefree memories into pieces.
The story says that in order to put on a shoe, someone cut his feet into the shape of a shoe.
He cut me into the same shape as everyone on this day, and I was stuffed into the mold and blood flowed out.
Back in the classroom, I sat there, and it was satisfied on the podium.
But no one dared to laugh at me anymore. The fat child broke the bridge of his nose and broke the courage of others.No enemies, no friends.I was treated as a sea anemone, and I would not sting if I stayed far away.
I don't need them to be friends.Han Zhao ran into me head-on on the street and was startled by the injuries on my face.
I'll fuck!Who beats you?!
Han Zhao has dropped out of school for two years and sells snatches in an alley diagonally opposite the seafood market.
He made some money, and he wore a fashionable leather jacket and a pair of big leather boots.
He was strong and thin, and his stature was bulging on his body. It was ridiculous to think about it now, but that era was enough to make a young man and a half arrogant.
My dad.
These two words immediately made Han Zhao feel angry.He turned around and accompanied me, and bought two oranges at the street stall.He peeled off his skin, stuffed it into his mouth a few times, broke two pieces and sent it to my face.
I don't want it.
Eat it and eat it.
Han Zhao had thick hands and thick feet, and the orange petals in his hand were hard on my mouth.I made him feel sore in the toothache, and I had no choice but to open my mouth.
The oranges are not good, they are extremely sour.But we both ate.
Han Zhao's family is also from a factory.My father fell into the cauldron and disappeared.When his father died and his mother got married, he lived alone in the factory, and no one drove him away.He and I are both freaks, and freaks have been close since childhood.
Han Zhao didn't say anything, so he accompanied me all the way, each of them ate an orange.After eating the orange, he slapped me in the back and turned around and continued to walk his.
The orange was put into my stomach, and suddenly I felt hungry, and my face finally hurt.
I started to stumble.In a class of more than fifty people, I lay down in the forty people and became invisible people.
I continued to fight with the giant python.
Since birth, I have conquered my hands, my feet, my eyes, my mouth.Every part of the body is mine, so natural and so natural.
But it is not, it is like a living animal.
Most of the time, it falls asleep; but sometimes, it wakes up.
When walking, when the trousers are rubbing; when the cold water is poured in big mouths after running; when Han Zhao's house, listening to the large tape recorder plays out soft songs...
I don't know why, and I'm too ashamed to ask anyone questions.
After it woke up, its throat became dry and thirsty, as if it was driving me to eat raw meat and drink blood.I wanted to control it, but it controlled me little by little.
Later, the hot blood became more and more intense, and even when it was sleeping, there would be a no-reason heat flowing in its body.I became irritable, irritable, and a fire that was about to hurt.
The unmanned brick field became my breathing territory.I piled bricks high, from all directions, and I hid them in the middle, as if lying in a well.
Taking off his pants, his penis stood up straight, without the tension, it pointed at the sky freely, as if it would breathe heavily.
I lay flat, my hands and feet stretched out into big words, no longer afraid of shame.
At this moment, I and it coexist peacefully.
There were dog barking in my ears, but there were no dogs in the brick field.
I put on my pants, climbed up on bricks, and looked at that place.
The brick yard is close to the river, and broken bricks are thrown all over the floor by the river.She staggered on the pile of waste bricks, almost tilting several times.
There was a puppy in the river, flapping vigorously, but it was not moving in the water.She rolled up her trouser legs, stepped into the river with her bare white feet, and leaned over step by step.
The river water exceeded the knees, and the rolled-up pants became useless.She didn't care, so she reached out to hold the puppy's belly, untied the broken woven bag that was wrapped around her feet, and got ashore step by step.
The mud on her pants drizzled on her calves, and the snow was run over by the wheels.She limped when her feet were pierced by broken bricks in the river.
She piled up the dirty fertilizer bags, put the puppy in, and pulled a large asbestos board to put it on the brick to make a nest for shelter from the wind and rain.
She left, but came back after a while, holding half a steamed bun in her hand.She fed it and went home happily.
I've never seen her like that before.When she was in the class, she was a cold and indifferent study committee member and would neatly tie the big red cross on our homework for the teacher, without any pity.
I sneaked over and looked at the dog through the gap in the asbestos board.The dog recognized good people and bad people, and it shrank in and grinned at me.
The little yellow dog was made of black and bare by mud and water, and was in a mess. He wanted to bite, but he didn't know what to bite.Hidden in a pile of bricks, no one cares about it, if you run freely, you will fall into the river and then drown.
I want to vomit.I wanted to pull it out, then use all my strength and throw it into the river.
I stood, the python under my crotch lowered its head, and the flames burning blood vessels were extinguished.I left it in the nest and didn't look at it again.
I know her name is Fang Yan.
Of course I can call out the names of everyone in the class, but those names are symbols, namely height, fat and thin, male and female, hot and cold.
But she is no longer a symbol, I know what she did, not everyone will do that.
The brick field is quite large. I leaned out of my pile of bricks and looked at her from a distance, but she wouldn't see me.She came every day to feed the puppy something.After she leaves, I will also go and look at the dog for a few more times.
The dog gradually became less afraid of me. It just hummed while eating, for fear that I would grab its leftovers.
I still hate that dog. When it puts two small paws on my legs, I push it away with my knees.
It became brave.It would follow her two steps as she walked, send her, and then turn around and run a few steps back to see if I had come.
I'm late.
Several vocational high school students dragged it out from under the asbestos board, laughed and poured water into its mouth with an empty beer bottle.It howled and whimpered, and its belly was suffocated.
A man's run-up two steps and kicked his stomach.
I grabbed the brick and rushed over, jumped up and smashed him in the head.He fell all of a sudden, bleeding from his ears.
They grabbed my arm desperately, and the joints on their hands were trapped in my flesh. The man got up and kicked me to the ground.
I spit out the things in my stomach all over the floor, but I still hugged one leg, bit it up regardless of the matter, and kicked the head again.
I had a fight and was not afraid of pain, but I couldn't get up soon.
Stop hitting!Someone called out, he was the little brother of Han Zhao!I've seen him!
It scattered in a hurry.
I wiped off the blood that covered my eyes with my hands and sat on the ground to breathe.
I turned my head and saw her stunned face.
She cried.The eyes were filled with crystal clear liquid, but there was no sound.
She walked over, squatted, and touched the puppy's head.The puppy's mouth was covered in blood, his eyelids trembled a few times, and he did not open it again.She put her hand on the puppy's head and didn't move for a long time.
I slowly stretched my injured leg, picked up a wooden stick, and dug a hole in the land.Then I walked over, pushed her hand away, picked up the puppy's body, and walked towards the pit.
She followed.She and I buried it.
Fang Yan and I sat together in the dog burying place for a long time, and it was almost dark.
Fang Yan took out his handkerchief and wiped the blood from my face.
You dip some water.I felt so painful when she wiped it, and raised my finger to Xiaohe.
If the river water is not clean, it will be infected.Her voice was hoarse.
I was silent for a while and couldn't help but say: You know a lot.
She said: I want to be a doctor in the future.
That's why you saved the dog.I seemed to understand something, but I didn't understand anything.
Did you see it?Fang Yan was a little surprised.
I nodded.I've been watching.But I didn't say anything more.
Be a doctor, can you save people?I asked again.
Otherwise?
What if it were them?Are you saving them too?I gritted my teeth and asked at the mound of dirt where the puppy was buried beside me.
I heard Fang Yan sobbing, but when she spoke, I didn't hear her weakness.
They don't know what they are doing.
I don't understand why she can forgive them so easily, and suddenly I feel that everything I do is meaningless.
I stood up in fear and turned my head to walk home.
Fang Yan called my name behind. I didn't even know she would remember my name.
Zuo Huan, see you tomorrow.
I know men very well.
I can understand that my father is as weird as my spirit and as high as Han Zhao.
I can see through the naughtiness, despicability, cowardice and obscenity of the boys in the class.
Because I am a man, I can imagine it.
But I can't imagine what Fang Yan looks like.It was not until she called out my name that I realized that there was actually a woman in this world.
It’s not that I don’t know, but that I didn’t look at it or think about it.After all, I have never even had a mother in my life.
I was confused in the morning, and it was the same.
But this time, the giant python seemed to have turned into a poisonous snake. It did not strangle my neck, but instead poked out from under my crotch, slid along the side abdomen toward my chest, then swam onto my cheeks, rubbed my eyebrows with fine scales.
I seemed to see Fang Yan's blood-filled lips moving gently, calling me Zuo Huan.
Suddenly, I felt very excited and looked for the toilet in panic. My muscles were tense, afraid that a drop would leak out.
But that was not something I imagined, but a symbol that I had never imagined.
The snake is no longer a snake, it has become my flesh and blood again, and it is finally conquered, after a spasm-like roar.
The burning heat that rolled in the abdomen for a long time seemed to have found all explanations, and they had already expanded to an uncontrollable extent.When they left the body, I vaguely got the answer.
It is smooth and sweet, as if the soul has ushered in a brand new structure, and the numbness of fingers and toes is like injecting fresh sweet honey water.
I woke up, got out of bed, secretly unscrewed the water dragon, and began to wash my underwear.
I got the answer, so I thought I had won the war with the giant python.
But I was too young at that time, and its surrender was just a conspiracy. It no longer fought with me, but became a soft bewitching voice in my ears.
Men have to fight against its bewitching for the rest of their lives.
I knew Fang Yan was secretly looking at me because I was staring at her almost all day.
I couldn't satisfy myself, I wanted her to look at me a few more times.
Fang Yan is very outstanding. She meticulously acts as the most dazzling student in the eyes of primates.
There are many like her, but she is different from others. She knows that it is what she wants, so she never works hard because of flattery.
But I am very flattering.
Since I was a child, my father threw it into the pile of books. I wrote the article in a very good manner with a little care and received a few praises from the teacher.
It’s even more important to say that English is, after all, I have the foundation of my family.
Unlike now, when students had just had twenty-six letters in junior high school, I could read high school-level sentences fluently.
But I was indifferent to the object I flattered about.
The biggest preferential treatment Fang Yan gave is the unblocked smile.
When my eyes were facing her, she always smiled like this.
But for this, this is her greatest courage.
At that time, when a boy and a girl said a single word, it was a burst of teasing and ridicule.
Girls have to face malicious and filthy words.
However, the children in the grid have grown up, and the air in the classroom has gradually become thicker.
Everyone seems to have entered a stage of being ready to move. When they laugh at others loudly, they also have a despicable desire in their hearts.
Several couples were accidentally caught by primates, and they were in chaos.
But the children still make progress, and no one can go against nature.
Perhaps, the ostentatiousness of those guys gave Fang Yan new courage.
She came to the brick field again, her throat trembling and she called me.
Just like she has already calculated that I will be here.And I was indeed there because I had fantasized that she would come again one day.
I ran out of the place I was used to passing the time, my heart pounding.There was no one around, but I found that I was countless times more timid than Yan.
I didn't even dare to look at her directly.
Which high school did you get into?The girl stood under the sun, dazzlingly white.
I haven't thought about this question yet.Han Zhao has asked me to do small business with him more than once, so I have the idea of finishing junior high school.
I want to take the No. 1 exam, you and me.She didn't act politely and said firmly.
I can't pass the exam.
You can.
How do you know...
Women mature too early than men.Fang Yan was no different from now on, except that she had fewer layers of damage-proof shells.She seemed to know everything, she knew my eyes were full of her.
Or maybe she didn't know that it was me who arrogantly fabricated her illusion.She just has the power of faith, like the reclamation bird.
Don't you have many books?Do you have "Shelmes" in your home?She suddenly asked again.
have.You want to see it?
I'll give you some lessons and lend me a book to read.
Fang Yan ran to my house.I clumsily dragged out a large cardboard box from under the bed and picked up books for her.Her eyes were shiny, and the look she looked at me was a little different.
Have you read it all?
Read it when I was a kid.
She suddenly smiled embarrassedly and sat next to the coffee table with a copy of "Reeds in the Wind".
I wrote the exercises silently until there was an ununclear knot, and then poked her arm with my pen.Fang Yan came over and explained it carefully.
Things in junior high school are hard to come by. She said it, and it flows through the flow.Before her father returned home, she ran away with her book.
She came every few days, changing books one by one, and most of the semester passed like this, and those bad courses were quickly covered by me.
She and I were separated by a coffee table and memorizing each other's questions. We were serious and could not tell anyone who broke into the house.
My father found out, but he pretended not to know.
The place where the two men live has a little more fragrance as a girl. How can I hide it?
One day, I saw his head swaying outside the window with a squinted eye. I was shocked and told Fang Yan to leave quickly.
But he didn't expect that he would come back after turning to Hei Tian outside, without mentioning a single word.
So Fang Yan came more times, and I didn't move away when I secretly approached her.
Soon, the scores on the paper were already like smoke and the teachers left me and her with only a smile.I was no longer careful when I stood with her because no one dared to stab our backs anymore.
This right was not won by my ferocity and fists.
It was Fang Yan who planned everything. She understood the rules very well. She knew that as long as we reached this point, we would no longer be afraid of the grass growing in the gutter.
We get less exercises and more free reading.She held the book and reached out from the coffee table, and casually hooked the back of my hand with her little finger.
I quickly grabbed her hand indulgently.
She looked up at me, pursed her lips, suppressed her smug smile, continued to read, holding her hands tightly with me.
I gently pulled her, and she happily responded, and walked around the coffee table and sat next to me.My arms and I were pressed together, warm, weak and boneless hands were like clouds.
In the days before, the thing under the crotch had struggled countless times, an unforgivable blasphemy.
I was afraid that she would see it, so I could only concentrate on putting my pen, pinch my knuckles to the point of paleness, and pinch my thighs a few more times.
I thought it would still embarrass me this time, but it didn't.
So the answer I got was distracted again. I don't understand what was wrong. It was entrenched there and was indifferent, but its forehead was wet like a cat that was only wet in the rain.
You don't have to work hard to be a good student.Fang Yan suddenly said.
Do you want me to be a bad student?I was confused.
No good or bad.Her voice was calm, and the hand that was holding me was shaking like an electric shock. You are different from others, don't be them.
Then why did you take me to do the questions?
There are indeed some things in this world that are more important than others. For us, scores are such things.
You can do it well without any effort. If you don’t do it, it will be a loss.Fang Yan was a little incoherent, but I understood.
If I don’t be a good student or a bad student, then what should I do?
Just be yourself!Fang Yan pinched my hand hard. Someone laughed at you, do you still remember that you hit him?
What's wrong?
I thought I was not afraid of blood. I wanted to be a doctor, but I was really scared by you that day.I don't know how dare you.Then you run away, so free, that's something I can never do.That day, I might have liked you.
Do you like me?I'm as stupid as a worm.
I like you.Fang Yan repeated the confession tremblingly, without retreating.
The warm water immersed me, the scene before me became blurred, and everything slowed down.
I pulled her arm and leaned over. She came to her senses and dodged in panic, only letting me kiss on the cheek.
She ran out of my house in panic, and her compulsive calmness had been shattered.I followed her like a lost dog.
Coincidentally, she actually ran all the way to the place where we buried our dogs.
She stopped panting and turned to look at me, her eyes flashing with huge fear and a ray of orange-red sunset.
I stood in front of her, not daring to walk forward, and begged all over my face.I was afraid that she would really run away, and the only one who could accept me was scared away by me.
Fang Yan struggled for a long time, and I don’t know if she thought I was pretty at that moment, just like she took out the puppy from the water.
She took a step towards me, and I rushed over with ecstasy and hugged her.Her hands and neck were cold.
Fang Yan, I can’t live without you.I said in her ear.
Didn’t you hold it all?There was a smile and a sigh in her voice.
Hiding in the small barriers of the siege of bricks, I kissed her mouth hard, she was as naked as she had no struggle or resistance.It was soft and soft as if I was sleeping on the Milky Way, and the stars were flashing in my mind.
Some things don't need to be learned.
My lips were pushed open to her lips, trying to kiss every corner of her. My teeth were bumping into each other and giggling. They were busy avoiding each other, their mouths opened and their tongues touched them gently, and they understood everything.
Fang Yan was not very shy. She put me on her body like a sea, letting me suck and lick her back, and letting me rub the clothes on her back to wrinkle and look undesirable.
She responded slowly with her tongue to my madness, like a rein that trapped the beast.
But she couldn't breathe in the end, timidly avoiding my pursuit and breathing heavily.But I continued to arch on her neck, greedily obsessed with the smell of every inch of her skin.
And she is also absorbing a wisp of my soul, the unrestrainedness she longs for.
You are so much taller than me.Fang Yan hugged me, leaned her head against my shoulder, and her rapid breath filled my ears.
We all grow very fast.
In two years, the hormones secreted shattered our bones, muscles and organs inch by inch, urging them to be intact again.
Theseus' ship sailed into the deep sea, leaving behind a self that we no longer know.
The high school entrance examination is over, and Fang Yan and I get what we want.
Those dirty and cramped memories are picked off one by one by one by one by one by one by one by one by us and thrown into the mud.
The future is like a vast plain, you can run to the fullest no matter which direction you go.
During the two-month holiday, there was no longer any restraint, and Fang Yan rarely looked cool.She came to my house and hugged me from behind. She stayed there for a whole day, with her slightly swollen lips before leaving.
The unrestrained temperature is hotter than the fire. In the steaming summer, the two of us faded our only reserve and had each other.
Being arrogant, rude, and selfish are not wrong.Only by being bewitched by that poisonous snake made me unable to forgive myself.
I ran out with Fang Yan in my arms, and was extremely frightened and smashed Han Zhao's door.
Han Zhao drove his taxi on the road, and Fang Yan's blood stained the white backseat cover.She lay on me, her lips turned white, but she touched my face with her hands and whispered to me, "It's okay, it's okay."
The bad start.
Later she was really fine, but I didn't dare to see her.Fang Yan acted indifferently, coaxed me with her unique calmness, and rubbed the bumps in my heart.
As stupid as me.
The first time she imagined turned into a terrifying pain and shame. I don’t know how deep the scars she left in her heart, how she survived the doctor’s contemptuous consultation, how she concealed the suspicion at home, and what she really experienced.
The first thing Fang Yan did after she came back was to heal my wounds.Facing my shrinkage and guilt, she still came over as if nothing had happened, hugged me, and kissed my ears as if it were.
I asked her, it hurts so why didn't I stop.
She said, I thought it hurts so much the first time.
I asked her, how could you bear it?
She said, because I love you Ah.
That year, Comet Sumeklevi rushed to Jupiter in a decisive manner, ending its roaming in endless darkness.
At a speed of 210,000 kilometers per hour, the scar it left on Jupiter is enough to swallow a planet.It is one with it forever.
She stroked my hair and hooked my lower lip with her tongue. Zuo Huan, forget it, forgot to hurt me, you shouldn't remember that kind of thing, you just need to remember how much I love you, I just need to remember how much you love me.
No one really spoke.She lifted up the short-sleeved school uniform, exposed the frozen pond, continued to move up, pushing a lotus leaf apart, and there was a white fish hidden under it.
Fang Yan thrust forward and said tremblingly: Look.
I touched her only twice.When she was truly presented to me for the first time, I almost became a beast again.
Holding the swelling of my temples, I bit her and tried to control myself from not exerting that force.
But Fang Yan still screamed and pressed my head tightly against his chest, as if he was afraid that I would shake my head and tear her off.
It was a miracle creation that men did not have, and thus gained great magic.
I was lovingly and intoxicated, licking and sucking, not understanding why there are such wonderful holy traces in the world.
It's like a kind of jealousy beyond imagination, jealous of what you don't have.
After tasting one, I pushed away the cover on the other side and threw it in, and the rain and dew were evenly mixed.
Fang Yan still felt so painful, but she hugged my head and smiled with tears: Do you like it so much?
I heard her voice whispering, and then I let go, kiss her tears, and then kiss her whole body one by one.
I kissed her until the grassy place and reached out to pull her waist, and then she forced her to pull her up.
No, no.It will take some more days to keep it, and you won't mess around.
That was a day when I couldn't disobey.But before I could move, she took off my sweat-soaked vest.
Fang Yan licked my neck and chest, licking it all the way.I was like I was over the electricity, and I didn't dare to move around, just like a prey that had lost resistance was being smelled by a beast.
My penis had been stoked by the blood of blood. Fang Yan put on the buttons of my pants and let it jump out. She slapped it, making me sore that I bared my teeth and cracked my mouth.
It's all because it makes me almost hurt.
Then Fang Yan kissed it too, and I pushed her shoulders and refused to let her go. She raised her eyes and glanced at me, and she was charming and provocative.
The lips were pressed on, gently pursed, surprisingly slippery.
It once fought against the rough trouser cloth, hard bricks and dry firewood fingers in anger, but it had never been so close.
My thighs twitched involuntarily, trembling with pleasure.
Fang Yan kissed it twice and then took it in ignorantly. No one taught him, and it was natural.My gritted teeth expression was encouragement, she knew she had done it right.
So her tongue started to move and sucked vigorously into her mouth.My teeth trembled and I held her head and raised my waist.
Most of the penis was thrusting into her mouth, and Fang Yan let out a few retries.I didn't dare to move anymore and rubbed her face.She looked at me with red eyes, very gentle, shook her head, and sucked in emotion again
My whole body was itchy and numb, but I was reluctant to poke her.
Fang Yan seemed to have realized it. She stopped swallowing it deeply, and shrank backwards, as if she was deliberately seducing me.
I was soaked in saliva and suddenly it became cold. I couldn't control myself anymore and finally straightened my waist again.
Fang Yan followed my strength and swallowed me hard.She endured the swelling and pain in her throat, and her thrustling neck turned into tenderness and sweetness.
She serves all her body and mind without hesitation.
My heart filled her, and the love that was rushing and agitation was left unrestrained.
If love is holy, holiness is definitely not white. The salty and fishy strong hit Fang Yan's throat, causing her to cough.
Fang Yan covered her mouth, her palms were sticky white.She looked at me and swallowed, as if she told me that none of my parts was dirty.
She was wrong, my purity was only everything and a moment that entered her body.
I don't know that love is such a thing, nor do she know.That thing is even more violent than the depression, loneliness and anger I used to be.
I long to be with her all the time, to touch her, to enter her, to the tongue, fingers, and penis, to rub her into my body, and to cast her with blood and flesh.
But in a new high school, everything is new, a new house, a new person, especially a new person.
I don't care about anything, I only care about Fang Yan.But can Fang Yan not care, as a girl?
A sunny and handsome boy became her deskmate, smiling and chatting with her.Fang Yan nodded politely to him and smiled at him.
I pulled him into the bathroom during physical education class, slammed him into the bathroom, and threw him to the ground, stepping on his head one by one.
He returned to the classroom in a mess, with paper stuffed in his nose and mud on his hair.Fang Yan looked at him in surprise, turned her head to look at me, she knew everything.She would see that my eyes were like manic lions.
The boy had his tail between his legs and stopped laughing with her or talking to her anymore.He treated her as non-existent, and all the boys began to treat her as non-existent.
After school, she caught up with me who had walked away alone in the brick field and said to me: You don’t have to be like this, I am yours alone.
I turned her around, turned my back to me, and pressed her against the brick wall.
Is that true?Is it true?I made a mean sound in her ear, biting her ear and her neck.
He lifted up his skirt, pulled off his pants, and stuffed his angry cock into her body.
That was our fourth time, and Fang Yan was so wet that she was faster than ever.
This was the first time, my dick suddenly poked to the bottom and splashed everywhere.
Her legs immediately became soft and she slid down with a whine.
I wrapped my belly around her to prevent her from falling down. I pressed against her back and tried hard like a pile, which made her ponytail spread.
Fang Yan held the wall with one hand and grabbed me tightly with the other hand and pinched her wrist.She turned her head tremblingly, looked at me and said: You don’t believe me.
The jealous tongue of flame was mostly extinguished by the bright color in her eyes.I couldn't attack anymore, and I stood there at a loss.
How could I not believe her?If even Fang Yan doesn't believe it, who is left in the world?
Fang Yan turned around with difficulty, climbed onto my shoulders with both hands, and hung them on me weakly.
I'm afraid someone will take you away and take you from your sight.Nothing can do, I can't stand it.
I was full of nonsense and didn't express my meaning, but Fang Yan understood it.
No one gives, no one gives.Fang Yan said softly, without any ups and downs, like a last word.
She kissed me, hooked one leg on my waist, and pushed my cock with her lower abdomen.
I fucked in again, and she screamed to the bottom of her heart, like the most naked confession.The love juice rolled along the inner side of her thighs, drop by drop, clumps, and the land became muddy.
Only in our fourth time did Fang Yan have the first climax in his life.
She bit my arm and cried, but her waist twisted into the easiest way I thrust.
I was also surprisingly firm, as if I was going to burn a layer of mark on her uterus.
Fang Yan was fucked by me to the point of squirting. She screamed, and the water that was holding me against me suddenly poured out as I twitched. With a puff, the light rain drizzled.The flower room twitched rapidly, crushing my middle path to death.
White turbidity poured into her one by one, and Fang Yan and I hugged each other tightly.What I got was a hint of peace, and she took out her bright red heart.
Since then, Fang Yan has never rejected my unfair request.
In the bathroom, she gave me a blowjob and was seen. The rumors came, but she didn't hear them.
Then behind the warehouse, in the brick yard, in my house, in her house, and in her house, I will ask for it.
I thought she was enjoying it, but I didn't know that it was just her own flesh and blood, feed me.
Fang Yan is pregnant with our first one.
She secretly knocked it out without making any sound.Before I could recover, I was pregnant for a second time.
Her body was weak and her grades plummeted. I realized it later and regretted that I shouldn't have been there.
The bloody proof that Fang Yan gave to me with both hands finally dissolved my jealousy and suspicion.She woke me up from a childish child to a man.
Fang Yan failed to enjoy how the man she made would love her, and the plane to the other side had already fallen from the sky.
She hugged me and cried bitterly, as if she had foresaw the annihilated future.
I swear to her to give her everything, with my hands, from the other side of the sea.
Vows are like children's play.
There is no interruption of karma.
If you fall into this prison, from the first time you enter, to hundreds of thousands of kalpas, one day and one night, you will die and live thousands of lives, and you will not be able to stay in a moment in a thought, unless your karma is exhausted...
Only then can one be reborn.
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