Chapter 16

It was still the same room, the same table, when the familiar figure walked in again, I hugged her immediately

You let me go, Lin Lan struggled to come out of my arms and said breathlessly, "What are you doing here? Didn't you say don't come to me?"

Don't you want to pay back the money? I raised the bank card in my hand

Lin Lan took the card in my hand and was about to run out, but I stopped the door.

Give me some time to say what I think, I said

Lin Lan finally sat down in front of me

I've passed the threshold in my heart. I said straight to the point, do you have any reason to swear me? Lin Lan looked at me, and her eyes suddenly trembled.

I used to be a weak man. I thought I was very strong, but in fact I was extremely cowardly. I was afraid of facing pain and I was afraid of losing what I had. So, when Xiaowen left me, I found Xiaoya. When you left me, I hid in Liu Yan's world again.

I said

Because I can't afford that kind of pain, I'm afraid of facing that kind of pain, and I always use injuries as an excuse to escape. I use money to pass on my desires, use desires to exchange for paralysis, numbing my body, and numbing my heart

I always thought I didn't dare to face your past, but later I realized that what I dared not face was myself, that weak self, because I was always calculating what I could get and what I would lose, afraid of others' accusations, and afraid of other people's strange vision. If the things I got exceeded what I lost, I would become hesitant and become cowardly and incompetent. Later, when I lost everything, I realized what I wanted in my heart. That knife was not stabbed in him, but in my heart. I wanted to kill that myself, that past self.

I said

My world has been cleared, and now I am just waiting for one thing, just waiting for one person. That thing is called love, that person is you

Lin Lan looked at me, bit her lip, and shook her head, I already have a boyfriend, we are going to get married

I looked at her and said with a smile, "Call him and let's talk in person. If it doesn't work, I can compete with him, okay?"

Lin Lan looked at me and finally cried with her face covering her face

I walked over, hugged her, and said gently, "Tell me what other reasons there are, even if I die, I will understand a little more."

I am almost thirty years old, and it is not worth it for a woman like me.

Don't say you are thirty, even if you are forty, I think it's very worth it.

Do you really don't care about the past? Lin Lan said in a trembling voice

I shook my head, I have never been a gentleman, I have even killed anyone, I am very happy that you don't dislike me

You don't mind me and him... Lin Lan said softly, that's your own right, I said, Xiaoya has had a boyfriend after leaving me, and I never cared about it, because everyone has the right to pursue love and happiness, and I am not qualified to deprive you of your rights

That's because she is your sister... Lin Lan said

You are my favorite woman, you have a higher status than her, I said

What if I tell you that I don’t love you anymore? Lin Lan looked into my eyes and said

So what is this? I lowered my head and picked up the necklace around her neck. Who set the bank card password to my birthday? Who told me at the police station that I was wrong?

Lin Lan fell silent, she collapsed on the chair and suddenly started crying

I walked over, stroked her face, lowered my head and kissed her hair, and felt endless emotion in my heart that this beloved woman, after experiencing so many hardships, was finally going back to me.

Lin Lan finally stopped crying. She raised her head, pushed me away and said, Thank you, but I still can't agree to you.

I was stunned for a moment, then smiled and said, "What's the reason, because I'm a pauper now?"

Lin Lan shook her head, do you know why I broke up with him?

Because you gave me all the money? I remembered Lin Qian's words and said

No, Lin Lan said, in fact, he was not my boyfriend at all. That day your sister said she was coming to me, so I looked for him and asked him if he would pretend to be my boyfriend. He agreed.

So, at that time, it was intentional to make me give up, right? I asked

Lin Lan nodded, but he kept chasing me later. At that time, I knew from your sister that you had found a girlfriend and was pregnant. I was so sad at that time and was already desperate for you. Later, I agreed to him.

Sorry, I said

But I had no feelings for him at all. I said I wanted to keep the best things for marriage, but later he took me to see his parents and said I wanted to marry me, I panicked. I knew I couldn't drag it down because my body couldn't get pregnant. No matter how I didn't like him, he helped me, and I couldn't harm him.

Lin Lan said

Didn't that lie to me? I said

No, it's true. Lin Lan said softly, I've taken too many birth control pills before, I went to the hospital for examination, and the doctor said that my secretion function was disordered, and I don't know where to start

So, I know you are the only son in your family. If I can't leave descendants for your family, I will feel guilty for the rest of my life.

I looked at Lin Lan and said seriously, I will take you to a better hospital for examination. If it can be cured, we will treat it. If it really cannot be cured, we will not want children, or we will adopt one

No, I can't do this. Lin Lan said painfully, my dad has a few brothers, our Li family has a successor for a long time, and it's not bad for me.

I said, I had long thought about it. If all living in this world is just a body, then what is the meaning of living? Where is my soul? My parents’ greatest expectation for giving birth to a child is not to give birth to children for the Li family, but to the happiness I can live in this life. If I live unhappy, what is the meaning of having more? Do you really want me to pick up a knife and look at myself?

Lin Lan's tears flowed out again. I hugged her and lowered my head to kiss the tears on her face.

Come home with me, we won't go anywhere in the future. I said gently

Lin Lan looked at me, with a little hesitation on her face

When I pulled Lin Lan out, Lin Qian looked at me with a look of surprise

I took your sister away, I looked at her and said

Take it away, take it away, talk about me here every day, I'm so annoying to her. Lin Qian sticks out her tongue at us

You damn girl... Lin Lan glared at her

Brother-in-law, we will get married next month, the boyfriend next to Lin Qian said

OK, I will come then, I smiled

When I went out, I saw my Cruze and I said to her, I have never let you ride the newly bought car, this one will be the only one in the future.

Lin Lan said, "It's okay, I like it very much, just like seeing an old friend."

Let's go, old friend will take you home, I smiled